I went over to Aneels's bedroom and saw him laying there with his hands behind his head, looking up at the ceiling. I went over to him and let myself fall next to him. His arm went immediately around my waist and I intwined our fingers, not being able to stop myself. The silence was comfortable. It was relaxing.
"What do I do now Aneel? I really don't know" I said quietly. I really hoped he would know something because I was really clueless. He grabbed my chin and made me look up at him. I stared in his bright green eyes.
"Look, she really looked like a nice person. She looked genuine. I mean, how she held you, how she cried. Did it feel all real?" he asked me and I nodded.
"Then just take your time. It's not something easy, I understand. You can't get used to it in a day. It needs time" he said and I nodded looking away. He was right. I couldn't do anything other then giving it time.
"Look at me" he said while turning my head towards him again. I looked up at him for the second time.
"I am here okay. Look let's get something straight. I- I know I can never be the man who will.. love you. But I don't want this to end. You were there for me even though I pushed you away. I just.. I don't know, you helped me. So I want to help you. Maybe one day you will find someone else, ut till then, please just stay with me. I will be there for you. Always" he said and my eyes widened. Did Aneel really say that? He chuckled and shook his head.
"Yeah, I really did" he said smirking. I just punched his chest lightly before placing my head on it. I wrapped my arms around him and just listened to his heartbeat. That calmed me down and it just let the pain fade a bit away. I mean it was just too much for me now. I am not strong. I can't do this all alone..
"Aneel.." I said softly. He just mumbled in response.
"Okay, I'll stay" I said before drifting off.
"You are worthless" he said kicking me in my stomach. It did hurt and I had the feeling that I needed to throw up blood. I closed my eyes. I couldn't watch this.
"We left you" another voice came. His voice.. No.. They didn't..
"We sold you" there was another voice. No, no it couldn't be true. Yassir and Yessin, they would never do that.
"Of course they would. We would" there.. She.. She would? No, she wouldn't. She is my mother. She is not supposed to.
"Stop it!" I heard his voice. His angelic voice. I smiled a bit. He, he is the one who never wanted me, but always saved me. He was there for me, always. I opened my eyes and saw Aneel. But what I saw the next made my eyes widen. They couldn't.. I wanted to yell, scream to them to stop. I wanted to scream that they could take me but not touch him. I wanted to protect him, like he always protected me. I tried to open my mouth but I just couldn't. It was like someone had his hand on my mouth so that I was not able to say anything. And that was when I saw Yassir pulling the trigger, aimed on Aneel..
"No?" I screamed, sitting up. I looked around and found myself in Aneel's bed. My eyes were teary and I couldn't breathe properly. That was when I felt arms around me and someone pushing my face in his chest. Aneel.. he is here, he is okay..
"Sssh, its okay" he said and I started crying out loud. He just held me and I wrapped my arms around his neck.
"They were going to kill you Aneel. In front of my eyes" I whispered, so that he couldn't hear. But he did anyways.
"I am here, I am okay. Nothing happened and nothing is gonna happen. Just breathe" he said and I did as he said.
After a while Aneel layed down and placed my head on his chest. When I thought about the memory and nightmare, I started sobbing quietly again. Aneel sighed and placed my head right on his heart. I didn't know why he did it, but it helped. Listening to his heartbeat just calmed me down. Just being here with him, in his arms helped for some weird reason.
I heard a phone ringing and opened my eyes. I sat up and saw that we fell asleep. Just when I was about to grab his phone Aneel woke up and answered the call. He went quiet for a moment before he frowned and sat up straight.
"What?" he said looking up at me.
~~~~~
Final Editing Done (01-11-2016)
~
YOU CAN FIND THE EDITED 'ISLAM IS MY LIFE' LESSONS IN A SEPARATE BOOK ON MY PROFILE.
Islam is my Life:)
Today I am gonna talk about marriage. Why marriage when I am not married myself? Well, now many people I know are going to be married in a couple of months, when they are too young and don't have work and stuff. People just take marriage slightly, but it's not something to take slightly. Marriage is being with someone for the rest of your life. Marriage takes too many responsibilities with it. Marriage is that you can finally buy bread for two or more people. The youth from now see all that lovey-dovey stuff on the television and around so they think it's all about romance. But it's not. It really isnt. Marriage is not anything you can just do cause you love someone. You first have to look if that person will be good for you and your family. Most girls want a guy who just could be a magazine-figure. But what do you have with a golden apple if the inside is rot? So the outside isn't that important, especially in this century. If you have a rot apple from the outside, but golden from the inside, you can always pell the outside. So the most important thing in marrying someone is the inside and faith. I personally don't want to marry someone who doesn't believe or just does nothing about his religion. Cause I know that it won't work than, cause I am someone who LOVES religion, and than I would like to talk with my husband about it and stuff, but if he has no interest, than I know there will be big fights..
ANYWAY. Some people asked me which age is good for marriage. To me, the age for marriage is if you can buy food for two people. I mean, you can be 19 and have a job for the rest of your life, but also 25 and have a job for the rest of life. To me, money is not important, but it has to be. Cause we all want a beautiful house and I dont want to marry and than struggle because of money. Now the girls around me marry but don't have a diploma or a job. And the worse is, their husband-to-be guys don't have a job too. Well, how will you support each other than? With help of your parents? But you are a visitor to your parents when you marry. You start an own family. You start an own future with someone. You can't ask them to help you, cause than just don't marry.
ALSO do I think that a marriage doesn't need love. I mean, some girls wants to marry with someone they love. Is good and all, but I think that you can have a happy marriage when you have just trust and respect towards each other. Love would always come. Even when it doesn't, you could be happy.
Marriage is something beautiful, but also something big. I have this notebook where I write things about my life in form of Hadith or just quotes. I also wrote a letter to my future husband. I mean, with every salaah I pray for him. That Allah may help him, bless him. Cause you wont know if he will have it better just because of your Dua. So pray for your future. Not just your husband but also for your children. Maybe you wont ever marry, or have children. But you wont loose anything with still praying for them.
Marriage is supporting each other. Marriage is finding your other half, completing the half of your deen. Marriage is teaching each other everything. Marriage is teaching each other life. Marriage is holding each others hands to go to Jannah. Marriage could be your ticket to Jannah. Marriage is a test, just like anything else. Marriage is caring for someone so much you never cared for someone before. Marriage is saving your body for a stranger who would be your life partner. Marriage is saving your beauty for years just for that person. Marriage is being responsible for each other. Marriage is happiness. Marriage is waking each other up for Fajr. Love is your beautiful eyes and perfect hair! (Sorry had to add that last part haha)
This was all MY opinion about marriage. Of course you could have another opinion, I respect that:)
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You, my Punishment (Islamic Story)
Spiritual"I know that we will never be a real couple, but we can at least be nice to each other Aneel" I told him. I've had enough. Tears were starting to prick my eyes, but I didn't let them fall. He looked over at me in a weird expression. Like if I died i...
