try, try again - klance (highschool au)

"Lance was alone."

WARNING: this chapter is really heavy and lightly describes my personal experience in an emotionally abusive relationship. there are mentions of self harm in here, but its still pretty thick. this chapter isn't that important to the actual story line, just know that Lance hates Allura because of how she ruined him and made it his fault.

have a nice day.

Lance didn't understand what made a relationship abusive. He thought that if one person was physically hurting someone else than it was considered abuse, but nothing else.

Three months into dating Allura, a previous member of his friend group, he finally got the reality. An abusive relationship isn't just marked by how many bruises someone has after spending a night at their partner's house, but it's signified by how wrecked they are emotionally when they finally get out.

Allura asked him out. It was a Sunday after a school break. He had just come back from New York City for a trip. She was texting him sentence by sentence, claiming the hypothetical that someone else had a crush on him. She had what seemed to be an elaborate scheme to blame someone else and then say it was actually her, like he would say yes to that.

Half out of fear and half out of loneliness, Lance replied "sure, why not?" and the two were dating.

Allura wanted to keep it all quiet. She didn't like the idea of people knowing she wasn't single. Lance wanted to tell everyone, he wanted to show off the fact that he wasn't disliked by everyone.

Allura said she had depression constantly. Claiming that her life was terrible and that she wasn't even a bit mentally stable, but didn't ever give context or examples. She said she was bullied and that nothing in her life ever worked. She pushed this all on Lance, who also had the same issues, but when he talked about it it was disregarded. Added to this were the lies and the claims about how amazing she was at everything, this completely contradicting what she said before.

All of this came to a climax when she started self-harming, but this happened to be a lie too. She never had a scratch and, even when she sent photos (without a warning), she didn't even break her skin.

Allura had caused Lance to fall into a hole. He was depressed more than he had any other emotion and was self-harming constantly. Slits of red blood starting falling from his skin, and then retreated to his ankles to be more discreet, all the while being disregarded by his own girlfriend. Allura didn't care about him at all, no matter how many times she said she loved him.

This back and forth continued for four months, until Lance finally realized he had had enough. He broke up with Allura first, but because of the circumstances, they had a long facetime call involving crying and a decision to get back together.

The relationship properly ended on a skype call with another friend. A joke that was slightly at the expense of one of Allura's friends was made, which Lance found funny. Allura left the call and texted Lance, breaking up with him. A few hours later, after Lance had fallen asleep, Allura sent him an angrier text. This one saying that if he said anything mean about this friend again she would beat him up. They had a conversation about it, Lance stating his case that he didn't say anything, he laughed at a joke, and Allura not having a word of it.

A few days went by and Allura had decided they were friends again, to which she continued with the cries for help in messages complaining about her life. Lance wanted so desperately to leave her life, bt she wouldn't let him. She continued to try and make amends with him, but she didn't understand the pain she had caused Lance.

Lance ignored her every chance he could, occupying his life with other things. Allura never let him have that life.

Ending it for good was Lance's move. He was gone physically, hoping that Allura would take that as a sign that he doesn't want her to be in his life again. Until one fateful day, when his crush left his house in an awkward silence and he got a message from the person who wrecked him. Allura.

@PrincessAllura: Hey, can we talk? I need closure.

He desperately wanted Keith to be there. Keith would let him tell him the story and have him cry unjudged in his arms. Keith wouldn't let him think about the pain she had caused him. But, Keith wasn't there. Keith couldn't help. Keith was gone in this moment. Lance was alone. 

a/n: I'm sorry for this chapter, that's all I can say.