Doing it Alone

And Your Point Is

I wake to the sound of my phone ringing, looking at the screen I'm disappointed when I see my mothers name across the screen. "Yes mother?" I ask standing from the bed.

"Veronica is coming today thought you could drop by." she says and I can tell she's smiling.

"Oh god I would never miss an opportunity to see my wonderful sister." I roll my eyes. It's not that I didn't like Veronica it was the usual sister competition between us. Veronica is about 3 years older than me and still lives her 'Single' life. Veronica works at a New York Radio Station and lives a life filled with drinking and advertising those places where she goes to drink. One of the many reasons my mother likes me slightly better is because I gave her her first grandchild.

"Should I send her to pick you up?"

"Why not that would be fine." I say and look towards the clock it's only 9:30.

"Great she'll be over in 20." my mother cheers.

"See you later." I say then click the 'end' button.

I walk over to Chris' room and wake him up. "Hey little guy wake up." I shake his shoulders gently. Chris opens his eyes slightly but closes them again. I don't try waking him again but just carry him out and lay his head on my shoulder. I walk back over to my room and put Chris down on my bed.

I pull out a simple white dress and slip on some flats. Brushing my hair I just put it in a low bun with strands of hair sticking out in the front. I keep my makeup to a minimal and just put slight mascara and colored Chapstick.

The door bell rings and I walk to the front door. I peer through the side window next to the door and Veronica is peeking through waving her hand furiously. I let out a deep breath before unlocking and opening the door to let her in.

On the outside we look nothing alike speaking Veronica looks like my dad and I resemble my mother. She's blonde and has a more slim figure, her eyes also aren't as dark as mine either.

"Sister." she smiles and warps her arms around me.

"It's me." I mimic her excitement and push her away slightly.

"How are you doing." she says and looks down to my stomach.

"I'm ok everything is good." I say and walk to the kitchen where the phone is ringing. Veronica follows me and I don't make it in time to answer. When I reach the phone the voicemail is heard.

"Uh hey again it's Phil, your cellphone isn't working maybe it's the wrong number, but I just wanted to say morning and I need you to send the students grades spread sheets. Call back." The noise is lingering as I turn to Veronica.

"Who was that?" she raises her brow and walks to me.

"That was Phil my teachers assistant." I say sitting and opening my laptop.

"Oh so you have an assistant, is said assistant cute." she smirks and pulls out the chair next to mine.

"You're kidding right?" I say to her and log into my email.

"What they guy sounded nice why not go for it." she laughs.

"Seriously Veronica Ryan died like 5 months ago." I shake my head to her and send Phil the email.

"And your point is." she looks at me.

"My point being I'm not looking to date nor do I want to." I stand and walk to my room. "Let's head to moms."

"Fine but this discussion isn't over." she says quietly.

"There's no discussion now can you get the spare car seat for Chris from the garage." I tell her and she leaves.

I fasten Chris into his car seat and he's still out cold, this boy could sleep forever. "So when will you be ready to date." Veronica slowly says.

"I'm not sure probably in 5 years." I joke and her face is in pure horror. "Gee Veronica I was joking, probably when I find someone who doesn't mind the pregnant widow." I say and we both laugh.

"Did you and Ryan ever talk about moving on." she says softly and turns her head to me.

"Uh yeah we did actually." I admit "We said if anything was to happen that we just wait until the right person comes around." I tell her and she just nods.

The thing with Ryan was that he was care free, he was a free soul and only wanted my happiness. The agreement was to wait until the right person and I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to find that person.

"So anyone you have in mind." she smiles.

"I'm not looking, as you can see men don't exactly find being pregnant attractive." I laugh and rub my stomach. "I'm not in a rush anyways. Speaking of relationships when do you plan on getting married, you aren't going to stay young forever."

She grips the wheel harder and sighs. "I'm not sure but I've been seeing this guy." she shrugs.

"Anything serious?"

"Not really it's only been 7 months." she smiles.

"Sounds serious to me." I smile at her and she blushes, I will have to find out about this mystery man later. Moments later we pull into my mothers drive way and when I look back Chris is awake swinging his feet. "Morning buddy, look aunty Veronica." I say to him and lift him off the car.

"Can I carry you Chris." Veronica looks at him and he reaches out. Veronica takes Chris from my hands and we walk into my mothers.

Walking in we see my dad sitting down on the couch watching some race movie. We close the door and he looks back at us. "Veronica!" he squeals and stands from his seats. He walks to Veronica and Chris hugging them both

"Hey dad how's it going." she smiles and the three of them move to the couch. I walk over to the kitchen and find myself dialing Phil's number.

There are about 4 rings before he picks up. "This is Phil." he says.

"Hi it's Bethany did you get the spread sheets." why the heck am I calling over spread sheets.

I hear him chuckle real quick from the other line. "Yes thanks for sending them."

"Don't you have other things to do on a Saturday morning besides work. Works for Sunday night." I say to him.

"Who said I don't have plans later today, I'm just doing a quick 3 hour work time." he defends.

"Well don't wear yourself out, bye." I say.

"Goodbye Bethany I will be sure to call later." he laughs and hangs up.

I look away from the window and see Veronica at the kitchen counter. "Didn't you sound adorable." she teases and bites an apple.

"I don't know what your talking about." I smile at her.

"Oh come on you sounded like such a flirt, and you don't even know it." she laughs head falling back and everything.

"Some people call it a bubbly personality." I defend, I'm certainly not a flirt.

"Just go for it." she smiles standing straight up and taking a few steps to me.

"I can't you don't understand Veronica." I sigh and look her dead in the eyes.

"Why can't you Bethany just do it." She frowns at me.

"I can't because I already found my love and he's gone. You only find love once and I did it was Ryan." I tell her.

"Maybe you thought you found love, maybe this is when you find the love that's been waiting." she says and touches my shoulder.

Why is this world so centralized around love. I didn't need love, she didn't understand. In fact no one knew what I was going through, I'm a pregnant widow and those love stories never work out.