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Chapter 28: Emergency surgery.

Declan

I have never been in so Much pain in my entire life. One time I broke my arm I thought that hurt. The muscles in my stomach I don't even feel like they exist anymore. I don't know how long I've been asleep but I know I've been sick for a while. Because when I open my eyes I just have to fight that I've been asleep for a while. Maybe not in a coma but a couple days. The whole room smells like old coffee. As I try to pry my eyes open I slowly put my hand to cover my eyes because the lights are so bright I know I'm in the hospital. 

I don't remember much. I remember being shot that's hard to forget because it was so painful! I remember blood. I remember Ivory. A jolt of realization hits me. Ivory! What happened to Ivory? Is she okay? How is she coping? I bet seeing me getting shot isn't the best sight in the world. As I think more about her there's something on the tip of my tongue that I need to realize but I can't quite get it out. 

I make a slight grunting noise when I try to sit up. That wasn't a good idea. I look down at my stomach and there is a hospital gown covering it. Definitely, in the hospital. I take my hand from my face and put it to the cover to look at my stomach. 

"Hey, careful now. We don't want you to rip your stitches," I hear an angel's voice say. Well, it's not really an angel it's just Ivory. Maybe her voice is even better than an any angels ever could be. 

"Stitches?" I say in a scratchy voice noticing that she said 'stitches'. 

"Yeah, you had to have emergency surgery," she says and a small voice not looking at me. Maybe seeing me weak and defenseless makes her not attracted to me anymore? Maybe me protecting her made her mad somehow? 

Suddenly the atmosphere is awkward and stiff. I look Ivory over. Her hair is into a high ponytail. She looks like she hasn't slept in days. She has the same dark bags under her eyes like her mother once did. She doesn't have the same depressed look on her face but she does look tired. She looks exhausted. She's only wearing jeans and a T-shirt that's mine. That says 'made in Ireland' on the front. 

"I like that shirt on you," I say smiling trying to reach for her hand. When I try I have to reach over and that hurts my stomach. I flinch in pain. Ivory hops on the case. Looking at my moderator checking if my heart rate gets faster as if she's expecting it to flatline. "It's not going to flatline you don't need to worry."

I was just joking but she seem to get all serious and gloomy. She starts fiddling with the ring on her hand like she always does. She doesn't look like herself. She isn't acting like herself. Maybe all of this was too much for her to handle? Maybe all of this death and distraction is too much for her to handle. It is too much for me to handle but I'm not as strong as Ivory is, no one is but I still have to ask her. 

"Are you okay?" When I asked a question she looks at me with wide eyes. She looks at me as if I asked her to join the circus with me. "What, is there something on my face?" I asked joking around trying to lighten the mood, at least. 

"Are you seriously asking me if I'm okay, when you're the one who got shot by my father?" She ask completely amazed. 

"Well, yeah. Is that wrong?" 

She closes her eyes for a second and open them back up. She tilts her head a little bit and confusion and looks at me still with that weird look. Is what I'm asking so crazy?
"Am I doing something wrong?" 

"Something wrong?" She repeats. "You're doing something extremely unselfish. You're the one who got shot, who is laying in a hospital bed, with stitches in their stomach and you're asking me if I am okay."

"Oh, I see your point now," she eyes her eyes and smiles my favorite slimes on her, but she thinks about something. The smile is no long on her beautiful face. 

"Declan, there's something I need to tell you."

Oh, no. That doesn't sound too good. 

"I just wanted to know... if your feelings were the same as they were before everything happened. Or if you could ever forgive me?"

Now it's my turn to look at her crazy. 

"Forgive you? What the hell are you talking about? What I need to forgive you for?"

"You got shot because of me. You almost died because of me. I already lost my mother and I almost lost you. If I were in your shoes I wouldn't look at me the same. I wouldn't want to be next to me," she says trying to move away but I catch her hand. 

"I'm sorry but if you think that, you're crazy. I don't know if you have not realize this but I have been head over heels for you since like I was ten. There is nothing you could do or say to make that go away. You can't tell me to get out of your life, you can't move across the country, you can't try to break my heart to get me to hate you because it's not going to work. As much as you would like to get rid of me sometimes I'm not going anywhere. 

And you were not the cause of getting me a shot, I was. Your father said it wasn't fair that you got someone to love you. I can see where you could think that's your fault but I chose to love you. I chose to stay by your side and protect you until he was on the ground. And if he didn't turn that gun to himself I would've tackled him to the ground for it. Don't you believe me when I tell you I love you. Until you honestly believe me, I will say it over and over again until it gets annoying. 

I. Love. You. you're better than any book character, you're better than any supermodel, better than anything that is even on this earth. You're the most we are listed beautiful creature there is on this planet. There isn't anyone or anything that is perfect for me but you. 

Not to be rude or anything, but get over it. You didn't have a gun in your hands. You didn't pull the trigger on your mother. I'm pretty sure I'll have scars on my arm from you digging in to get to her. So don't you dare blame yourself for one second. You didn't do it when you were nine, so don't start now. Because I will personally seduce you with my chart to make you forget everything," I finally finished with my little speech. All of the color that was drained from face earlier is suddenly back with the flash. 

She smiles big. The first real smile that I've seen on her in awhile. Her eyes are like the color of a rainy day. Grayish blue sky. Maybe that's why I've always love the rain because it always look like her eyes. 

"I know, this is kind of off-topic but I've been reading a lot about this poem end it with me a lot. Do you want to hear it?"

"I'll do anything just to hear you speak," I say scooting over very slightly to give her room to sit on the bed with me. She blushes a little and get some about weaning her head on my shoulder. 

"'Love is kind. Love is patient. It does not boast. It is not jealous. It is not proud. It is not self-seeking. It is not rude. Love is not selfish. It is not easily argued. It does not rejoice over the wrong but rejoices with the truth. Love always protects. It always trusts. Love, Hope, Believes, and bears all the things. Love never fails and now these three main: Faith, Love, and Hope. Love will last forever. '"

When she finishes from reading this poem from memory. I simply just stare at her. Absolutely uncontrollably amazed. 

"I love you," I say completely unaware that I'm saying it. 

She smiles and kiss me on the cheek, "I love you, too." 

"What the hell!" I yell. 

"Hey, there might be little kids running around!" 

"What did you just say?" She didn't just say what I thought you just said. That's what was on the tip of my tongue. This isn't the first time she said it to me. Something like that shouldn't separate my mind. Well, I guess I get a pass I was losing a lot of blood at the time. 

"I said I love you, too. Oh, Declan, do I need to go get a tissue to wipe the drool from your mouth?" 

"Are you going to dress up in one of the sexy nurses outfit?" She starts bursting out laughing. 

"In your dreams, you pig!" She says leaning closer into my chest. 

"Yeah, I think my imagination will let it go farther than reality," she laughs more. I pull her so she's laying on my chest. I get a big gush of scent of her it's as if I can breathe now. The smell of flowers in spring fills my lungs in the somehow health is heals me from all the pain that I was feeling 10 milliseconds ago.