No Love Allowed

Chapter 15

Chapter 15

The Feels

 

Charles Point of View

 

 

                I started to conjugate the words to fit their personnel.

Yo = miro

Tu= mira

                We were looking at the verb ‘to look’, why? I don’t even know. This was Spanish 2! For god sakes, we know how to conjugate already!

Let me stop… I don’t even know why I’m acting like this… the real problem is Derek. He’s not human; I know that for a fact.

                Why am I drawn to him like this? Lately things have been getting worse… I mean like, yesterday I got hard off him when he walked passed me. That never happened before! It was so embarrassing, I went to the bathroom not a second after it happened and when Brandon asked what happened, I had to lie. I never lied to him before, no matter how embarrassing it was… I never lied to him.

                Over the pass week, Derek has been the center of my headaches. I mean, on Monday in that hallway? I was so happy, but then his eyes turned yellow again like it did in the beginning of the year and I just… got scared. I was so scared; I think I was on the verge of peeing.

                I don’t even know why I let him get that close in the first place. Like, how can I forget what happened last week Friday? What he did to Jason’s arms… how the guy with the red hair did the same to me? I knew that was painful because it was to me, but Jason didn’t cry like I did. He was a true man, I was a wimp.

                I let Derek touch me and kiss me… a total stranger.

 And you liked every bit of it my conscious told me.

Boy was it right. He had the magic alright… maybe he was like a wizard or something. But why would that affect his eyes? How can he cause such a thing to arms with his bare hands? Why and how does he have me so stuck on him?

                It’s funny because I still see him as safe to be around… don’t ask me why because I can’t answer that. Its like, the fear is there but sometimes something just covers it up… like something is making me only see the good in him… when I think back, its just crazy.

                I ran a frustrated hand throughout my head, it was Friday. I need to get a break, January was so close. New Year, new me… No more obsessing over a guy that seems to be interested in me. If he was, he would just straight up tell me.

                I doubt that would happen.

                After fourth period, there was lunch. I just got my food, ate it with Brandon and put my head down when I was done. Jennifer didn’t even come to school today, or this whole week… Except Monday. Ya know, when Derek was with me in the hallway. Sheesh, I can never get that out my head. Even when I’m not even thinking about him, something always points me back in that direction…

                It makes me remember.

        I remember how I felt and how hot I was getting, how he placed his hands just above my ass. And how he smelled my neck like he did after he scared the hell out of Kevin. I laughed. Why does he do that? What the hell do I smell like for him to smell me like his life depended on it? He’s such a mess. I inwardly laughed to myself.