Hidden 8th | BTS

Stage 23

Chapter 26: Stage 23

It was about midnight. All the stalls who aren't 24/7 have already closed down and left for the night. The stars and moon were brightly shining in the night sky. The birds and day animals had went to sleep, save for the strays and insects that roam into the night for leftover food in the trash and cricket whistles that forever hunt the night sky.

It was fairly peaceful outside.

Too bad it couldn't be said the same for the tired boys on the deserted hospital waiting room.

There sat Jimin, Tae and Kook using each other as pillows. Hobi, Yoongi and Joon were either on their phones with their battery barely dying or drowning cans of coffee from the vending machines to keep awake.

And the only one that stood, leaning against the wall, was Jin. He couldn't sit, touch his phone or do just about anything else.

He just couldn't.

Not right after what had happened.

The doctors had said that it was bound to happen eventually. That it wasn't he who caused the problem.

But he couldn't help but think, he was the last catalyst to knock you down.

Thoughts that ran through his head had not settle down even after the same thoughts were repeated all day.

It was him that knocked over the multiple glass tanks that Tae brought.

It was him that quietly nudge Hobi to refill the water.

It was him that joked about a good prank of stealing your clothes, he didn't think Kookie would actually take it seriously.

Heck, he didn't even know that you were still outside freezing until you came into his room stealing his hoodie.

He shouldn't have get mad.

He shouldn't have chased you.

Shouldn't have headlocked you.

Shouldn't have been jealous and missing the times where you came and sleep in his arms.

And that was the dreadest thought.

He missed you. He misses you.

He wanted your attention. He wanted you to talk to him again. An actual talk. One that didn't involve taking clothes and shouting a small thanks while leaving.

He wanted you to cuddle with him once more.

And maybe...just maybe if he weren't so selfish with his own needs.

Unnecessary needs.

Then maybe.....just maybe, he would have known that you were suffering as well.

He wanted to scold Taehyung, Hoseok and Yoongi for not telling the rest of them. For not telling him.

Yet he couldn't.

A university degree student my ass.

An outstanding university graduate in one of the top univerities in Korea was nothing but a title.

A title that held no use.

What was the use of it when he couldn't even notice the differences in his members.

He failed as a hyung. As a friend. As a member. As a brother.

And you know what's worse?

He could still feel it.

The you who had felt so small when you fainted into his arms. The you who he carried in panic to the hospital room. The you who he held on tightly for dear life, as if you will crumble apart in any moment. The you who he saw being carried into an operating room, as the white metal doors slam shut in front of his face. The you who had been inside that sealed room for hours, with the red light still clearly evident.

The you, when even in sleep, looked so sad.

--

Music Sheet #1993

If only I could rewind time and start over

You cry between the shadow and light

No matter what, rain falls

No matter what, darkness erases

I'll definitely save you

You are not alone

If only. You could let us in.