Open Eyes (Phan)

Eleven

Dan

I felt my shoulders sag with relief when he suggested that we go. You could cut the tension that was coating the table with a pair of scissors. And I wanted to get out of that confining room, and out from under Phil's intense blue gaze.

I had been surprised to see him walking down the street. And even more surprised when he called my name and waved at me. He had remembered me. He had remembered my name.

It sounds so pathetic, I know. But I was used to having people forget about me.

I couldn't forget Phil, though. I tried. I tried and tried and tried. But every time I closed my eyes I saw his face. His eyes. His smile. I found myself hoping my fathers beatings would knock the man from my head. Because he wouldn't. Get. Out. I couldn't stop thinking about oceans and the night and snow.

Every word that slipped past Phil's thin pink lips made the red, puffy lines on my arm throb. Every breath that left his lungs made every bruise on my arms and legs and torso ache.

I had dragged that thin silver blade across my pale skin every night for the past week. Each mark had been slashed into my flesh angrily.

And when Phil kept pressing me to tell him what was going on I almost broke. Almost. I was so close to collapsing and telling him everything. Fuck, I had no idea why. I had only just met him. But already he had shown me more kindness than I had received from anyone in my entire miserable life.

His disappointed sigh when I told him nothing was wrong shattered me. I was such a disappointment. Because he was trying, God only knows why. But he was. And I couldn't give him what he wanted. I couldn't tell him that my life was a living hell hole because my drunk step father beat the life out of me just about every day. I couldn't tell him that I was a bullied outcast at school. I couldn't tell him that all I really wanted was to just die.

I spent the walk to the corner trying to shut out the screaming in my head. And when we reached the fork in the road, I went to cross the road, to go face a completely different kind of hell.

And that's when Phil grabbed my arm before I could get away.

And despite being great at constructing masks to hide my emotional despair and my psychological diseases, I couldn't cover up the flinch and the pain that flashed across my face. And when I looked into his eyes I knew he had seen. I knew there was no way I could play this off.

Terror filled my limbs. I tried to take a step away, but he held my arm in a firm grasp, his fingers closing around bruises and cuts. Everything inside of me disintegrated when he pulled up my sleeve.

I was frozen in fear. I watched his face, his eyes, as he took it all in.

My arm looked like a battle ground. Fresh, maroon lines crowded my entire arm. Black and blue and purple and green and yellow bruises fought for space on my skin.

Phil's mouth hung open. He did nothing to conceal the millions of emotions that danced across his features.

"Dan... Who...." He couldn't figure out what to say. "What?"

I tried to pull away again. Mistake. His eyes snapped up to mine. The ice in them tore at every tendon in my body.

Fear, concern, rage. Such burning rage.

"Who did this to you?" His words were laced with so much anger it made me tremble. All I could do was shake my head as burning hot tears gathered in my eyes. "Who did this to you?" Phil repeated, raising his voice. Blue flames danced in his gaze. My heart raced. My breathing became shaky and choked.

"I-I c-can't!" I shouted. Tears streamed down my face. I tugged on my arm again.

"Dan! Who did this?" He was yelling now. And it scared me. It scared me beyond belief.

"Y-you're hurt-ting m-me!" I yelled back, tugging.

At those words, Phil instantly released my arm. I stumbled backward, but caught my balance before I could fall backwards. And as soon as my brain registered that I was free, I took of at a sprint. I ignored the pain flaring through ever part of me as I raced across the street. I ignored the sound of Phil's voice as it called out my name. I didn't stop running until I was slowing down in front of my house.

My lungs burned as I fought to catch my breath.

My step father's car was gone. Thank God.

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Sorry I know it was short. I ran out of things to put in this chapter. I promise the next one will be longer. ily!