Irhaboggle Pride (2018) 30 Days, 30 Stories

The Shower Drain

"Cap. What is this?" It was evident from his tone that Maxim was doing his best not to get angry.

"Uhhh, the shower drain?" Captain asked, genuinely not understanding why his husband looked so annoyed.

"Well, yes. But what's in it?"

"Uhhh, looks like... hair?"

"And why is it in there?"

"Oh! Uhhh, guess I must've forgotten to clean it up after last shower, heheh..." Captain gave a nervous laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. Maxim continued to frown at him, clearly neither amused nor impressed.

"Alright, alright, alright, I'll get it," Captain conceded, dropping to his hands and knees. He leaned towards the clogged drain. Yeesh! It was more clogged than he'd thought! But the mess didn't really bother him, so, after a small shrug, he tugged at the first strand of hair he could grab. Oooh! Stuck, stubborn little lock of hair, huh? But Captain would still not be deterred. Instead, with another shrug, he simply fixed his grip around the strand of hair and tugged harder. Ah, it still wouldn't budge! Not even a little! ... Well... That might pose a problem!

"Now you see the problem," Maxim said patronizingly, as if he'd read Captain's mind.

"Yeah, I see your point," Captain admitted.

"Ugh, sometimes I wish you could be more like me!" Maxim lamented. He was completely bald, had no facial hair, and was even known to shave the rest of his body, too. By contrast, Maxim had to wonder if Captain even knew what a razor was. Or if he'd had any of his hair even trimmed in the last decade or so. The wild mass of brown hair that led from the top of his head into his Santa-like beard was reason enough to doubt.

"There's literally enough hair down there to make a coat!" Maxim cried. Captain looked thoughtfully at the drain.

"I have used my beard as a blanket before," he muttered. "I wonder if I could ever make a coat out of it."

"Oh, good lord, please don't!" Maxim groaned. Captain only laughed in reply.

"It's not that bad, is it?" he asked.

"Well, seeing as how even you couldn't tug any of it loose, I'd say it is that bad."

"Ok, fair enough. If I can't get it fixed after one more go, we can call a plumber."

"Good, I was just about to take a shower, too!"

"Don't worry, we'll fix it as fast as we can, and then you can have your shower, your hairlessness."

"Your hairlessness?" Maxim snorted. "At least it causes less problems than that overgrown forest you have!"

"Hey! I would've likened it to a glorious mane!" Captain stroked his giant beard.

"Just help me clean the drain!" Maxim interrupted.

"Alright, alright," Captain's eyes twinkled as he knelt back down.

A few minutes later, though, something else managed to clog the drain.

"Captain!" Maxim sighed and buried his face in his hand.

"Ooops," the larger man grinned sheepishly.

"Alright, hold on," Maxim sighed, then he stood up and grabbed some soap and hot water.

"You won't need a shower at this rate!" Captain joked.

"I can't believe you're taking this so lightly," Maxim replied as he proceeded to pour the soap and water over Captain's large hand. It didn't work.