The Red

Chapter-38

Stella's P.O.V.

"THE DARK LEONS ARE MARCHING TO DEFEND THE NATION! BOW THY ALL, AND PAY RESPECT!!"

A loud voice echoed in the four corners of the palace. As the man ended his sentence, there was a sudden gush of people moving. Then, there was a thrilling silence. Everyone was on their knees. They were bowing the knights and the soldiers, who were supposed to stand against wind kingdom. Amid of silence, some of there were shedding tears while some of them were praying for victory. I could see unity in them. Each one of them wanted the victory but they also wanted their soldiers to return safe. It's a great greed, isn't it? After all, they were human, and when has human been able to control their desire?

I rode along with captain Lucas and other four knights. We were riding at the front row. As the queen ordered, I was one of the knights who were supposed to lead the war. I know, the queen and her strategist had already seen the outcome on my part. Therefore, they had backed me up with another knight. However, he was strictly ordered to lead his soldier toward my side only if I was greatly wounded. In uncomplicated words, she wanted me dead.

My hands were trembling. Knowing that I would be dead as soon as the war started, I couldn't calm myself. However, death was a matter of second. Once you are dead, all your fear and troubles will vanish in thin air. What I greatly feared was the situation where I would be greatly tortured by the sight of blood, bodies and helplessness. I had been through that and at that time, I genuinely thought that death would be better than such suffering. Yet, I was greedy to live.

I clenched my fingers around the halter at the fear than I might fall out of nervousness. It was a great relief that people were bowing down. Otherwise, I was sure to garner much attention and malicious glares.

Of course, there was a pain of leaving Erwin. There always was. But I had come to accept my fate. My heart no longer wished to be with him though I would love to. The only wish left was to live a life; an easy life where there was no blood, bodies, power and manipulation.

"Even this wish will fade one day." I mumbled. We were crossing the palace gate at the moment.

"Did you say something, my lady?" Lucas asked, looking confused.

"Ah, nothing. It's nice to meet you again." I smiled awkwardly.

"Ahh- it is. I can't say how happy I am to see you alive." He smiled back.

He gave me a genuine smile.

"Usually, people who falls in that dungeon doesn't come back alive." He looked the other way as he smiled sadly. His eyes seemed to reflect pain in them.

"Guess, I am really lucky to live." I laughed it off and patted his shoulder. I then, started to ride ahead of him. I was selfish. I didn't wish to comfort him on my own pain. It actually lifted my heart after knowing that someone else was in pain as I was.

How selfish. I thought, but it is this world that has turned me into a greedy monster.

I bite my lips, realizing how I was turning into the people that I was scared of. I despised this me. As I rode through the bushy path, I kept on recurring the event and hated myself. At the end of the day, I couldn't breathe through this hatred toward myself. Therefore, I tried to live through the solution.

I pulled the halter and stopped in that busy path. Everyone else behind me must have been startled. I could hear the humming of the soldier.

"Are you tired my lady?" The knight next to me asked.

"I am fine. Thank you for asking, Mister." I replied without batting an eye.

I could hear the slight chuckle from the knight as he rode past me.