Thorns and Roses ❦ Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them ❦ Newtina

Chapter Seven

   Tina awoke with a start. She shifted uncomfortably, the eerie quiet of the room filling her with unease; most nights, if she woke up, she'd be greeted with the familiar whoosh of her sister's breathing in the bed beside her. But, for now, there was no noise to be heard. Tina lay all alone in the room, only her thoughts to keep her company. It was not something she enjoyed. She could hardly stand how quiet it was- it reminded her of the aftermath of a battle, the heavy and solemn silence settling over those who'd survived, how it felt as everything registered itself. The guilt of surviving assimilating within her. How unfair it was for her to continue her life as normal and for another's to be ended in a loss they wouldn't feel. A silence descended upon those who'd lived to tell the tale as they were buried in their own thoughts, their own grief.

I should be used to this pain by now, she thought to herself. I'm an auror. It's no use feeling pain toward someone that's already died. There's nothing I can change about it.

And yet, the hurt still lingered. Tina bit her lip to stifle her cries. Being heard was the last thing she wanted. How embarrassing, she thought. Saving a man only for him to hear her crying afterward. What would Newt think?

Newt had surely put up a fight after he'd awoken. Medics flooding the area demanded for him to be sent to an emergency medical centre, but he refused. Although Tina agreed, she granted his wish; anything that could lift his spirits was enough for her. That did not, however, stop her from taking immediate care of him the moment they arrived back at his parents estate. Tina forgot any and all injuries she had suffered during the short-lived battle in favor of tending to Newt's ailments. Enough so that when a cut on her cheek began to bleed again, she didn't notice until blood began to drip down her face onto a wet cloth she had pressed against Newt's forehead. Even then, she was reluctant to leave Newt's side, only doing so to tend to her own needs when his mother stepped in and promised to look after him in the moments she'd be gone. At her return, Tina found Newt fast asleep, and his mother recommended she do the same. Uncertainly, Tina head back to her own quarters, though sleep didn't find her. The moment she laid under the fluffy covers, her mind trailed back to the battle.

And so there she was, screams and cries echoing throughout her head. The few who had died, their final breaths replaying in her head. Tina knew there was nothing she could've done. Her main goal was to locate as many of Grindelwald's men as she could and reprimand them before they caused more damage, to find the outlier. These deaths weren't directly caused by her, Tina made herself remember that, yet the guilt of being alive still clung to her. It drowned her, seeking no escape and only darkening her mind further.

And then there was the memory of Newt.

His lips pressed against hers, the moment of pure bliss they shared together. How everything in the universe seemed to align itself at once. Never, had she thought to herself, would she feel this way for another person, and not someone as exclusive as Newt Scamander. Part of her still couldn't believe this was true. Perhaps it was an imaginative memory, something her brain created to forget the trauma that she experienced on this night. But she could still feel the press of his lips against hers, the moment of euphoria, what it was like to have him ripped away from her, signaling the attack of Grindelwald's followers. That pain, she realized, was something ingrained in her being. The fear, utter hopelessness, how terrified and confused she was, thinking of the events seemed to transport her back to that event.

She could feel it. The tightening of her chest, her breathing becoming rapid. The panic flooding throughout her was something she couldn't stop. In the span of a few seconds, Tina found herself curled up in a ball on the floor, unable to contain her sobs and the fear spreading throughout her.