I focus on the bleeding
in my Left Arm for so long
the destruction I've created
the pain I've caused myself
I pick at the wounds in my skin
until it starts bleeding again
I complain of an itch in my brain
I complain of the old blood stains
I complain when there's no one listening
I speak even after saying everything
The scabs begin to form
and the pain begins to heal
and I think maybe it fades
maybe it's true and it goes away
but there's this tugging in my Right Arm
and it never goes away
one day I start to wonder what
could make me feel that little tug
and I see it's bleeding too
and I start to feel it
dripping down my Arm like new
and I start to feel him
in every corner of my mind
I start forgetting
the pain in my Left Arm
the pain from Right is so strong now
that I believe Left is better
I don't even feel it anymore
until something grabs my Arm
and yanks it
and the stitching comes undone
and suddenly I'm exposed again
I'm open and fresh
and both Arms burn as I bleed
my lungs scream holding back pleas
my mind cries when I have to lie
lie in a pool of my own blood
my own filth and mess
my own pain and suffering
and I want to tell you I am sick
but you want to solve the problem
and I'm tired of solutions
I wish you would all realize
that there are none
there is no solution and nothing will help now
I just have to bleed
I have to let the scabs form
I have to toughen my skin
but first I have to bleed
first I have to die a little
first I need a last
and the last was in my Right Arm
the first was in my Left
once I finish bleeding out
I'll be ready to confess
I'm dying where I lay here
and I've killed my kinder mind
fear will always lay here
my mistakes are made
I'm scared I'll mess up once again
that this pain will never end
maybe next time a leg or my head
the bleeding keeps on going
and the pleading never ends
YOU ARE READING
Poems of Death
Puisi***TRIGGER WARNING*** Feel close to death? Maybe you're not quite as close as you think. These are poems I wrote for me and people I love; some were gifts and others are just my thoughts. These are my own words and images. Although this is for mysel...