2014
"Are you mad?"
I heard that voice coming in front of me. I immediately lifted my head to the direction of the voice only to see a figure of someone I'm really familiar with, tilting his head the the left, hands in his pockets while looking at me with his puppy eyes and a little pout.
"oh my gosh!!", i said half-shouting while clenching to my chest. Startled.
"taehyung you scared the shit out of me! I thought it was a ghost!!", i shouted annoyingly. It was not my intention to yell, but maybe him surprising me at the very moment I don't wish to see his face the most did affected me.
I stood up from the swings to face him who's taking steps closer to the spot where i was standing.
"Im sorry..." he said while scratching the back of his head. "I didn't mean to scare you". He did forget that juhyun is a little bit jumpy.
"What are you doing here this late? Why didn't you go back yet? I went to find you at your room but you weren't there." he asked monotonously. Looking straight to my eyes.
There's guilt i can see in his eyes.
I was mad after thinking what he did to me today. After tons of plans and promises he made, he just ditched me, his own best friend for a woman he barely close to.
but
i get it... i am nobody.. that's right.. im just a 'friend'?? i have no right to get mad.. it's not that i am in anyway special to him from his other friends right...
i didn't matter
"Nothing..." i said avoiding his eyes. Fidgeting. I can feel his stares at me. I don't want to return it. I can't tell him what i really felt but I can't lied to him too. He knows when i lied, because i am bad at it. He somehow know that much too about me.
"Im just out breathing some fresh air... what are you doing here?" now meeting his eyes that hasn't move from me since earlier.
Why are you staring at me like that..
"I-..... Never mind.....let's just go back shall we", i said cutting him off.
I don't intend to continue this awkward conversation any further thus i think it's better for me to leave first. I faked a smile before walking passed taehyung to the direction of our way back to the hostel. Leaving him behind.
"She's still mad isn't she", he figured.
"Wait!" suddenly i felt a tugged on my sleeves. He pulled me back to face him. He held both of my arms with his hands gently.
"Hey!" he said softly with his deep voice staring at me trying to meet my eyes. "You're still mad aren't you?"
Please, dont use that tone on me.
You're going to hurt me.
"No...Why should i??" i said looking away to from his intense stares. I tried to break away from his firm hold, but of course there's no used for it. My small frame is mostly useless when it comes to things regarding strength.
"L-Let me go... don't you have anything better to do.. go back to your room.. i-im okay if that's what you asked.. im used to it.. being alone" i said emphasising the last word while still struggling in his hold. It's my intention to include sarcasm in my tones but i dont think he noticed it.
