Normani watched me pace around the basement. We have Lauren chained to the bed. She has red eyes. Its Camila. I have to continue to remind myself that I chained a monster to a bed. But every twenty minutes Lauren begins screaming. Her eyes turn green, scars and burns begin to appear.
Then all of a sudden it stops. Her eyes turn red again and her mouth twists into a cruel sneer. It laughs. Camila seems overjoyed how much pain this is costing me. Costing us. I look over to Normani and she shrugs.
"I cant do it Dinah. Im evil inside and out. Helping an Endarkened would be easy. If I got something in return. But exorcism? For a Shadow thats simply doing what most do? How would my father feel?"
"Your right." I whisper. "So get out."
"Dinah I cant leave you alone-"
"Why not? Your pure evil. Trying to save myself from death is exactly what your dad doesnt want. He likes seeing my kind suffer. He likes the pain. There are things worse than death Normani. This is it. For Lauren and for me."
"No matter what you think I still care-"
"No you dont. Because then youd help me. Because you are just like your father."
Her eyes darkened and narrowed. "Because I dont posesse the magic you need. Because you need the help of an egyption magician or a Shadowhunter. A Nephilim."
I nod. "And your niether. So just get out."
"Your going to sit here and listen to her scream. Your going to watch. And you need to kill her. Put her out of her suffering. Take yourself out of your own." Normani begged.
Camila laughed. "There is one way to get what you want Dinah Jane."
"And that is?"
"Im willing to free the girl, for a price."
Normani looked at me. "We both know her price will be too high."
"And we both know nothing will stop me."
She gave me a small chuckle. "You know what I should tell you? The truth. But its obvious youd never trust me."
"The truth about..."
"About you. About Lauren. About your family. You remember Julia?" Normani pointed to Laurens bed. Where she lay in a sheet of blood. There was barely a place on her skin that wasnt damaged. Her skin ice cold and pale. "Camila over there is the one that killed her. And you know who sent her? Your father."
A blade was in my hand faster than the blink of an eye and I threw it to the wall beside Normani. "Get the hell out of here." I told her icily.
She gives me a bored eye roll but marches up the stairs and the door slams shut.
Camila laughs. "Still pushing away people I see."
"Just tell me what you want."
But she ignores me. "You know Normani actually cares about you. Dont you remember the day she took you in while you were running from your dad? The abusive one? Oh wait thats both of them." She snickers. "Normani helped you and you pushed her away."
"So?"
"So now. Your going to kill her."
~~~~~
Guilt and pain took over my stomach as I made my way back to Club Exile. The one place I always knew shed be. Camila knew what she was doing. Lauren is going to hate me for putting her in front of Normani. No doubt Camila has already informed her of our past.
"Who are you?"
I had climbed through the window in search of something to eat. My dad had hit me and my mom was dead. There was nowhere for me to go. Not anywhere I belonged. Alexander would find me sooner or later and Id prefer to be able to fight when the time came.
"Dinah." I whisper. "Im sorry I was-"
Normanis eyes weaken. "Oh. Your hungry."
Her voice is gentle. Soft and kind. She runs downstairs and appears moments later with a sandwhich and a bag if chips. I move forward cautiously.
"Your not mad?"
"Well using a door would have been more civil." She says with a small laugh. "But no. I can see it in your eyes your hurt. What happened?"
She gestures for me to sit down in front of her. I slowly eat the sandwhich. "Well my mom died and I didnt know what was happening. My dad came home and he looked at me in disgust. He asked why I didnt save her or call and he hit me."
The memory was so painful and recent that I broke into sobs. Normani wordlessly took me in her arms and rubbed my back.
From that day on for two weeks she helped. She comforted me and gave me food and a place to sleep without question. But one night I heard her scream. I ran downstairs and she withered at her dads touch. I knew who he was and who she was. And I realized all the pain and sacrifice she had taken on so I could be safe. Okay. Happy.
And I did the only thing I knew how to do.
I ran.
When Normani approached me at the club she knew what was happening.
"I hope your willing to take on my dad."
"I never said thank you." I whisper. "This is whats happening and you did all of that. I wouldve died and now this is how I return the favor." I shake my head and laugh. Disgusted by myself. "Im just like him."
Normani sighs and holds both my hands. "Your so much better. You feel the guilt this causes you. He wouldnt. If this was him having to do this in your spot he wouldve marched in here and tore my heart out within seconds. And he wouldnt feel anything."
"Please dont try and make me feel better." I beg. "That just makes the guilt worse."
She takes out my knife. "Take care of her."
"I will. I promise."
"Promises are made to be broken Dinah." She says.
My hand trembles as I take the knife. Taking her heart and taking a piece of mine. Running again before I can be caught. Thats all Ive ever done though. Run from what I need to fix. And I realize that all this running, it gets me nowhere. Im running to a stand still.
