The Blackout (Under Construction)

Is this real?

I sat in the back seat of the car impatiently.

“Where are we going?” I asked every two seconds.

“Somewhere you can be safe” my dad repeated, each time I asked. I was unsure and it worried me.  I hadn’t had my anxiety medication yet so I started to shake.

“Your mother and I are going through a difficult time son” he told me “I’m very sorry for you being affected by this, but I’m taking you somewhere safe. Don’t worry son”. I grabbed my crucifix necklace and hoped to understand what he was muttering to me about. We arrived at this bricked building with a sign that read ‘Safe Home for Boys and Girls’.

“Safe Home?” I asked. My dad grabbed a tight hold on my hand and looked me in the eyes.

“Listen son” he said “I’m very sorry, I love you and I’m only trying to do what’s best for you, I’ll be back when it’s all better for you”.  Still with a tight grip on my hand he took me inside the safe home and started filling out forms. He gave me one last hug and then he was gone.

“Welcome!” I looked up and saw her. She was a young woman with short black hair and glasses. She looked like she was in her early thirties and she had dark brown eyes. “I’m Mrs. Robbins, your teacher, counselor, and current guardian” she explained “I think you’ll make a lot of friends here, we are all family here” she said smiling at me “you can wait in the hall; I’ll set up a room for you”. She grabbed the papers my dad just signed and put them in a file folder, then walked away. I walked into the hall shyly. There had to be at least fifteen to twenty boys in that hall and I felt like they were all staring at me.

 "Christofer Lombardi" Mrs. Robbins called into the crowded room full of boys.

"Yes Mrs. Robbins" I answered.

"Your room is ready, come with me".

♦♦♦

When I woke I wrote down my dream. My memory was slowly coming back. I miss Liam and I really want to remember our last moments together. I want to remember how he died. I clenched my crucifix necklace and got up to get dressed.

“Maybe if I went back” I said aloud.

“Went back where?” my dad asked from behind me, startling me.

“Uh, nowhere” I said. He gave me a glance that pierced my nerves and my knees started to shake.

“Exactly” he said “you aren’t leaving your room”.

“How about I pop a glock in your mouth and give you a brain slushy!” I thought to myself. I threw myself on my bed with a sigh; my dad was being a hard-ass today. Maybe it’s because my attitude towards him, but I didn’t care. In a way, I hated him. He ruined my life. He’s the reason why my mother is gone. He tries to lock me up every chance he gets, I’m sure if he heard all my thoughts of him he would lock me up in a mental home. Well, who wouldn’t lock me up in a mental home? I’m sure in my entire lifetime I have thought up over a thousand ways to kill my father. With nothing to I grabbed my mp3 player and listened to some music.

♪♪♪

It was dark outside and rain started to pour out my window. There was something about the rain that soothed me. I felt at ease when it rained. The song ‘Superstar’ by the Carpenters played on my mp3 player. I closed my eyes and let the music consume me.

“Don’t you remember you told me you loved me baby?”

I jumped to the sound of thunder that roared through my headphones.

“You said you’ll be coming back this way again baby. Baby, baby, baby oh baby. I love you. I really do.”

Suddenly her face came to my mind. That girl, I needed to find her, that’s if she’s real. I’m starting to question if any of these dreams are actually memories, or just dreams.

“Loneliness is such a sad affair and I can hardly wait to be with you again. What to say to make you come again? Come back again and play your sad guitar”.

Lonely and disappointed that I was sleeping alone, I closed my eyes and drifted off.