wordlings

midnight

sometimes its 12am and I don't know how to feel;

Khalid is on loop and I'm displaced with a pen and paper, questioning my essence and importance (also praying for heartbreak to relate properly to these melodies)

I nearly forget that I have to get up in less than six hours and pretend to live for the rest of it (nearly, as I don't because self punishment is good revenge)

I'm still forgetting how to feel even when the slow fan bites at my fingertips and nipples (the rest of me burns in chills).

I mean I've felt everything there is except heartbroken misery and death (one of which is a deepest desire and the other a cut away)

When its midnight, my spirit becomes heavy (as do my eyelids).