21
"Are you ready for this?" Harry asked Luna outside of the building.
"No, but it is something I need to do."
"And Justine..."
"I don't think she's ready. We all heal differently."
"Do you want me to come in with you?"
"If you go in there, you are probably going to kill him. And while I wouldn't mind this, I don't wanna see you end up there." Luna turned and looked at him.
"Okay, well I'll be waiting right here for you."
Luna had arranged a visit for Zach. Most people wouldn't want to see the person who had single handedly ruined their life. But I think we can both agree that Luna isn't like most people.
She took a deep breath and walked up to one of the officers.
"Hi, I'm here to see Zach. Zach Kingsley."
"Luna?" the officer asked looking at her schedule book.
Luna nodded her head.
"Is this a conjugal visit?" Luna choked on her on saliva. It was like she could never catch a break.
"No. Not that kind of visit." Luna grimly replied.
"I'm sorry. Uh just follow that man right over there." he pointed to another officer who was sitting by the wall and drinking a cup of coffee. Luna thanked the man and headed over to the other officer. She read his name tag before speaking up to him: Officer Bailey.
"Hi I um am here to see Zach Kingsley."
"Follow me."
His voice was deep and a bit intimidating. Luna quietly followed him and thoughts were going wild in her head. She was hoping that an officer would be in the room with them or that other people would be there too.
Officer Bailey led her to a room and closed the door behind them Just like she hoped, there were multiple officers in there and other people visiting those in prison.
"He's right there ma'am. You've got an hour, but if you need to leave earlier just let me know." He smiled at her.
She made her way over to Zach whose back was facing her. Her nerves starting growing wild and she was starting to regret even coming here. She pulled up the chair in front of the table and reluctantly looked up at him.
"Hello Luna." he smiled at her. "I'm surprised to see you here. Don't get that many visitors and I've been here for a couple of months. More like 3."
Luna didn't speak, she didn't know what to say.
"So what brings you here?"
"I need closure." She managed to say.
"And I'm the person who would give it to you?"
"I think...I just want to move on. I just want to rid myself from you. Do you...do you know what you did to me?" Luna's voice got louder.
"I apparently took advantage of you." he sighed.
"No Zach, you didn't just take advantage of me! I fell in love with you, do you remember that?! And then we dated and all was well until we broke up. And after 3 years of being apart we finally got back together. And you knew I didn't want to have sex yet and that I wanted to wait. But that didn't stop you because you did more than take advantage of me. You ruined my fucking life Zach." Angry tears sprung from Luna's eyes.
"When people touch me, all I feel is you. I constantly have panic attacks and have PTSD. I can't give myself fully to anyone because I just keep going back to those nights. I have become everyone's problem and everybody is looking after me and treating me like I'm gonna break any second. And maybe I am going to break but you're the one who did that to me. I can't live a normal life anymore because of you. Everyday when I wake up I have to live with the fact that I had been raped. Everytime I go to bed I have to know that I have to wake up and face the world and face myself. I wanna die at some points because it would be so much easier than living with this ginormous weight on my soul. You did this to me and fucked up my life Zach."
She didn't care if anybody was listening or looking over at her to see what her deal was. The only person she needed to care about what she had to say was Zach. He was the one who had done all of this to her, not them. Neither of them said a word. They both sat in silence. Luna's head hung down low and Zach's focus was on the wall.
"Listen...I'm not sure what to do or what to say..." Zach scratched the back of his head.
"Are you that fucked up to not know how to apologize. To me, to Justine or to any other girl who you have raped?" Luna looked at him with disgust.
"Well I'm sorry then."
"It didn't come from the heart Zach. You don't mean it, so don't say it. You're not sorry for anything. After all of this I thought that you would know what you've done wrong. But your a fucking asshole Zach. I hope you never have to go through what we have gone through." Luna got up and pushed her chair in.
"Luna, wait." Zach called out to her.
"I hope you rot in hell, Zach." She spat out.
She didn't even wait for Officer Bailey to escort her out. She didn't even care enough. She just stormed out of there as fast as she could. Harry saw her coming out of the building and brought the car around.
"How did it go?" Harry asked her as soon as she got in the car.
"He's an ass, but that's not a surprise." Luna grunted.
"How are you feeling?"
"Better I guess." Luna shrugged.
Harry held one of her hands as he was driving. He was hoping that it was going to provide her with some comfort, and it did. The ride home was silent. Just the sound of him humming along to the radio and the silent tapping of his fingers on the wheel.
"So, I was thinking, now that the weather is a lot nicer, should we go to our spot?" Harry asked her once they passed Daisy's.
"I've been waiting all winter for us to go back to our spot." Luna smiled at him.
Harry turned the car around and parked in front of the cafe. They waved to Daisy and Niall through the window and walked over to the bench. Once again they sat in silence. They didn't need to use words to understand how one another was feeling. They just knew.
"You know I love you, right?" Luna asked him, breaking the silence.
"I know." he smiled. "I love you forever and always."
"I know. I just wanted to make sure you knew how much I loved you." Luna smiled.
YOU ARE READING
Hard to Love (h.s)
Fanfiction"She had come to the conclusion that nobody would love her, and that was how it was meant to be. But that wouldn't stop her from loving others."
