Book Two - It Should Have Been Us

Chapter Twenty Five

The flight attendant's voice rang out asking us to fasten our seatbelts. I didn't sleep a wink. I tried to. I've been dead tired the past few weeks helping James tie out loose ends, making sure nothing would go amiss. Jenny and her husband assured us they will take care of things but it still took us two months to get everything straightened out; James supervising the transition in the management of the restaurant himself. We also used Natsumi's first birthday as an excuse to extend. But truth be told, we both know we were just trying to delay the inevitable.

Even before Reese made his birthday wish, the thought of going back home has already crossed my mind. It was a thought that I kept dismissing. I looked out the window just as the plane settles on the ground. Home.

James has been quiet all throughout the flight. We waited for the other passengers to clear out before leaving our seats. He fastened Natsumi's baby carrier while I fumbled with Reese's seatbelt. The moment Reese was free from his seat; he started jumping up and down. Sam and Kianna walked over to us and Sam picked Reese up. Sam took his promise to Reese seriously; even going so far as to fly to Australia earlier this week to accompany us home. And James mentioned something about Sam arranging for Reese to meet with Paulo and Aki over the weekend.

Ready? James asked before we even crossed the ramp.

I took in a deep calming breath. Yeah, tara na? I tried to avoid his probing eyes. He can see right through me.

He took my hand and gave me a reassuring squeeze.

Some fans and press people were already crowding the arrival area. Cameras constantly clicking trying to get a glimpse of Reese and Natsumi. Sam and Kianna were quick to shield him, but Reese didn't seem fazed by the crowd. He was even smiling from ear to ear while Sam

tried to pull his head down. Natsumi was asleep and I doubt they can see her with the way she's been snuggled in James.

Not five seconds in the house and our faces were already plastered on the tv screen.

Hey, dad. James passed Natsumi to Daddy Malcolm then crashed on the couch, stretching his legs and arms.

You both look terrible. Tom motioned on the screen as he walked over to me. Hey, you. He kissed my cheek in greeting as he handed over a glass of water.

Thanks. I yawned.

How about you both rest for a bit? We'll look after Reese and Natsumi. Lauren suggested.

That's a great idea. And call her Jamie, not Natsumi. We all laughed at James. He was adamant on Natsumi now he won't even use it.

Talk to him. My head turning to face him. His eyes were still closed. I thought he was sleeping while I have done nothing but stare at the ceiling from the moment we lay down. I didn't respond so he continued. You need to talk to him. If only to set your mind at ease.

James-

He turned sideways to face me, placing his thumb on my lips. Whatever you decide, I will be here for you and for Reese and Jamie. Always.

I didn't say anything. But I know in my heart, he's right. I can't put this off any longer.

Reese saw Paulo and Aki that weekend; when he got home I took the coward's way and hid in our room. It took me a couple more weeks before finally having the guts to see him. Truth be told, I'm scared of seeing him. What if I realize it's him I want in my life after all

and not James? I told James about my worries but he assured me that he would never leave my side no matter what; that he will remain my friend if that's what I need him to be. He even set it up for me; he talked to Len and scheduled my lunch with Paulo.