It's easy to look at love and and admire it. You'd dreamt about it your whole life, but nothing could have prepared you for the side effects of it, for the fragility of breaking and for the angst of falling.
Around you, even when you hadn't noticed...
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“Jimin bruh, I'm amazed” Hoseok shook his hand, bringing him in for a brotherly embrace.
“Thankyou bro” Jimin answered, a thought hanging from his lips “Where were you?”.
Hoseok had certainly not been on the performance list, he had been waiting for him, sitting there, watching him from the crowd, cheering him on like the supportive friend he was.
“I'll explain later” He replied, hand on Jimin's back. “Right now, I need you to go up there, and stand on that stage like the winner that you are”. He said, pointing at the small corridor as both of their gazes fixed on the bright spotlight.
Jimin was scared, that was clear. But, he was scared in a different way, worried that he would fail, that if he didn't get this win, he would be nothing. It was bad to think that way, he had come to realise that after some time, but he couldn't help it. It was like he constantly needed someone, something, to prove his worth to himself, not anyone else but him and only him. As much as Jimin loved it, as many sleepless nights he had spent in that studio practicing until he couldn't even stand on his own two feet, his muscles aching, he still didn't feel like it was enough. He needed the reassurance.
“No matter what, remember how great you are Chim” Hoseok gave him a slight push, urging him to move forward.
He took a long, deep breath, eyes closing for a mere second before he confidently strode up to the stage, his head up high.
It was fake, all of it; the confidence, the feeling of accomplishment, it was all a mask, created by Jimin's fear of failing, falling, giving up.
The lights shone over his face, his skin warming up at the sudden heat.
The rest of the damces stood at their respective places, moving onto the stage after him.
“So, the judges have finally come to the decision, and let me tell you, it was hard” The presenter spoke, the microphone close to his thin lips.
Jimin's heart pumped loudly in his chest, almost escaping it's cage. The nervousness ate through his skin, his nails digging into it harshly.
“The winner of the 4th Japanese dance trials... Is...” The man slurred, opening the envelope slowly, building up the suspence.
Jimin gripped his skin even harder, almost wincing from the pain. At this point, he didn't even care about the mark it would leave, he needed a distraction.
He waited, a little too long, his curiosity running high. He couldn't take it anymore, if the results weren't announced soon, he would jump off of the stage and announce them himself.
“Park Jimin”
Park Jimin.
Everyone got up from their seats, a loud round of applause all for him, him and his art. He was suddenly attacked by the long arms of his friends, all three of them trying to take him in for a hug, big smiles on their faces, but Jimin, he was as still as a rock. He was taken aback.
This is actually happening. He thought, his eyes roaming the audience, until he caught sight of a cute brunnete in a little black dress. She came. His smile grew to his ears, grabbing the flowers and small award that the judges handed out to him, congratulating him one by one. Jimin bowed to them, walking down the stage with the boys after he exchanged some words with the rest of the contestants.
It was all like a flash, a blur to him. It happened, just like that, no effect. He was sure his heart had stopped for a moment after he heard his name being called, it was all he ever wanted.
Hoseok handed him his belongings he had left backstage, giving him a friendly pat on the back.
The boys walked out, chatting as they made plans to go and grab a snack.
__________
You felt the chill of the damp air hit your skin, the dark clouds covering the night sky. It felt nice, the intense feeling that grew in your heart after his breathtakingly emotional performance, the soft forms of pure nothingness that cried unstoppable tears, making the air smell like the most nostalgic memories that obtained your mind. Once again, you were amazed, your breath stolen with the click of a finger. You huffed sharply, closing your eyes, relaxing your overwhelmed soul. You couldn't understand. How could someone make you feel this way? It wasn't just him, it was the way he moved, it was the way the music travelled through his body.
It was; enchanting.
You felt weird, a good weird
__________
Jimin turned his head to look at the busy street, cars running wild, people rushing home from their late night shifts. His gaze flickered to your shaking form, the noises of the soft banters completely fading out.
“Guys, give me a second” Jimin said, approaching you slowly.
He wasn't thinking, just doing, and maybe this time, it was for the best.
“You cold?” Jimin asked you, still in his performing outfit.
You turned around at the sound of the familiar voice, a slight smile forming on your lips.
“A little” You answered, he smirked lightly. “Well, got any plans?” Jimin said, cutting straight to the chase.
You pretended to think it out, already knowing you had no plans, a crystal clear agenda.
“No, I don't think so” You replied, a playful undertone to your voice. “Well then, we should get going shall we?” He decided for the both of you, not giving you a choice as to what you would answer.
You raised your eyebrow, a weird look on your face.
“I mean...” He pulled on his words. “Tae will be there, I know you like him”.
You shook your head lightly, following him as he walked closer to his friends.
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Excuse the mess that this is, I wrote it in like four sittings and between watching a movie, I hope it atleast make sense.
