It's been pretty nice living with just Blake. The house has the calm that I had been craving when I was living with both Liam and Blake, but it has the life in it that I enjoyed having them around. We haven't talked about the situation with Liam, and that's fine with me, but I can tell that Blake has a lot of questions. He doesn't know what Liam said or why he isn't living with us anymore, but I'm sure he has a couple of guesses.
Rochelle gave me a couple of ways to cope with the manic episode. She doesn't think it's Bipolar as of right now, but with the depression that she diagnosed me with, it isn't impossible. I've been feeling a lot less manic these last couple of days.
It's been four days since the fight and I am back to the confinement of my house. I don't care if someone stabs me at school, I am not fighting anyone anymore. I miss having somewhere to be. This house is only so big and I've been essentially trapped here for three weeks straight.
But really, Blake has been doing his best to make it better. He hangs out with me pretty often and it's been kind of cool. We play some of his video games since he can't play with Liam anymore, we watch TV and he is always making me laugh, and we even started painting together.
Art is a private matter for me. It's one of the only ways that I really express my emotions and show how I feel inside. It's my therapy. Sharing it with Blake felt vulnerable, definitely, but I didn't mind it that bad. He sits next to me and silently indulges in my art with me. Blake is not a very good artist, but I can tell he is trying harder than he wants me to think.
Blake stays home from school with me, and the school has been very understanding of the situation so all he has to do is do the work at home and go to football practice. Since Liam isn't here to babysit me while Blake is at football practice, I go with him. It's not technically school so I can go since I'm not on the team anymore. Sometimes one of the girls will sit with me and we'll hang out. Obviously, not Ali.
Blake is a good football player. He's strong, quick, and athletic, but he doesn't have the solid base of a lineman. Poor boy is getting thrown around by the rest of the line. I've tried helping him, little tips and tricks I've learned over the last 3 years, but his pride doesn't let up. Men.
This week made me realize that I never watched sports. I just played them. But I like watching Blake. For starters, he's hot. I can't believe I didn't notice how freaking hot he is in football pads. But more than that, he has this magnetic personality. People look up to him, go to him for help, it's like the game revolves around him. It's kind of cool.
The team doesn't have a game this week, so even though it's Friday Blake just has practice and not a game. Today Sam and Claire sit with me.
We all work on our homework and chat, occasionally checking out the hot men in front of us. They haven't asked me why Liam isn't talking to me and from what I gather, he isn't talking to any of them either. I can tell they want to ask, it wouldn't bother me if they did.
"So what's going on with you and Blake?" Surprisingly, Claire is the one to ask me. Normally, Sammy would be the one to ask an oddly timed question out of the blue. Claire has a little more finesse to her.
I furrow my brow, "Me and Blake?" Here I thought she was going to ask about Liam, definitely not Blake.
"Yeah, you know how you too are basically dating but you seem to be ignoring the fact that you're sitting here waiting for him like a girlfriend would." Sam holds her chin on her hand as she doodles in her notebook. She finished her homework a long time ago.
"I am not waiting for him like a girlfriend. I can't be alone, so I wait for him here." I defend myself. I'm not acting like a girlfriend. I'm acting like a friend.
YOU ARE READING
Saving Amaya
RomanceI know I'm not beautiful and I'm okay with that. I'm not some princess frolicking in the woods waiting for some Prince Charming to save me. I am perfectly capable of saving myself. I'm just fucking tired of trying to. ------- Amaya is the farthest...