The Skin I'm In

Chapter Nineteen: Breakthroughs

Spring's P.O.V

I knew the day was nearing and I was okay with it, I was ready for me to fall into a pit of oblivion for deeds to be done in order for me to move on with my life and recover. Now I am not gonna sit here and sympathize for myself, there's people out there dying, slaughtered lives in every corner they seem to turn or want to take. I have the opportunity to better my life, whereas before when I was little I never thought I'd live to be turning sixteen in the fall. Now here I was breaking all the odds my previous doctors predicted, I wasn't dead and I was nowhere near it. I was at the top of my classes, something that I had worked so hard for and I hate it when people try to invalidate my achievements by saying that because I have a disability I am already a step ahead and don't have to work as hard as the next student. Yes, this has happened to me before and it pissed me off when this certain individual did say such thing. I simply shut them down by saying exactly what was on my mind. I am a black fifteen year old girl that happens to have a condition, and yes I will brag and say that I am an intellectual person, therefore don't let these doe eyes fool you. It shouldn't matter the color of your skin, whether you are brown, yellow, green, black, porcelain, but for some reason it does and I will continue to break the odds. I have millions to prove wrong and one me to prove right and so do you.

I hadn't spoke to Harry since the whole diner ordeal and I figured I should let it go, maybe even let us go. I don't think I thought this whole thing through, maybe that's why I've put Harry in such an awkward position as well as my family. Where they didn't even know the extremities of our relationship and I don't know if I wanted them to know. It wasn't that I didn't want them to know, but I didn't know if they'd see it as unrighteous because I dated someone who didn't go to the same church as us or the fact that I was too young to date at all. I wouldn't blame them if they thought either. They are my parents and they do want the best for me. Not only that, but I didn't know if I was in the right headspace to have a relationship, they kinda scared me as stupid it sounds.
Feelings scared me.

It hurt me to think of Harry and I in such an unsure manner, before it was so easy to know that it was right to do this, why was I having second thoughts now?

We'd been through so much together in such a short amount of time or the span of the school year anyway.

Putting down the clothes I was packing for the trip to Miami tomorrow, I decided to pick up the phone and call him. What's a relationship without communication?

Was I doing this right?

I was overthinking everything again.

I needed to do this.

The ringing tone stopped and I heard a cough before he spoke.

"Hey babe." He greeted.

Oh geez.

"Hey, can you come over?" I started, getting straight to the point, knowing I'd definitely find a way to avoid the topic if I didn't get straight to it.

"I really need to talk to you."

"Yeah sure. Is everything alright love?"

I could hear the concern laced throughout his tone.

"Yeah, just promise me you'll be here?"

"I promise."

The call ended there and I continued my previous task of mentally and physically preparing myself for the long drive to Miami. Soon enough I heard a soft knock on my window and I quickly opened when I looked to see it was Harry crouched in front of the window. His face held a serious glare as his eyebrows laid low on his face. If I didn't know any better I'd be scared of his demeanor, but I knew it meant he knew something wasn't right.

"Hey."

He immediately cupped my face in his hands, kissing my lips softly and searching my brown eyes fiercely with his jade ones.

I couldn't help but smile at his protective nature, it was endearing. Right now I didn't need protection, I need him to listen.

"Calm down, Harry. I'm fine. I just want to talk."

I sat him down on my bed and sat closely next to him, knowing if I wanted this to be stopped I had to bring up certain things I wasn't necessarily comfortable with, but I'd do it for the sake of him.

"I'm sorry for being so distant lately, I've just been so caught up in getting myself ready for the surgery."

He stared at the wall blankly as I touched his hand knowing that was the only way to get him back to me.

"I've got to tell you something." He started, making my stomach feel like it was about to plummet to the sole of my shoes. I wanted nothing more than to kiss the sadness away that appeared heavily through his thick accent, so this could all be over.

"Yeah, of course.", I urged him to go on.

He sighed heavily as I watched him try to break his   highly built walls for me.

"My oldest sister, Darcy. She went through a lot in her last year of high school. She'd starve herself and she'd be admitted into the hospital because of fainting in class and my parents didn't tell me because they wanted me to focus on school and-"

I squeezed his hand softly. I'm afraid I knew where this was going and I couldn't let him go any farther, my conscious wouldn't let him. I myself didn't tell him the most personal thing that occurred in my life. I couldn't let him do this.

I think he understood that I couldn't take anymore by my face as I looked him dead in the eye.

His forehead laid upon mine and I watch his eyes flutter closed. His lashes laid upon his cheeks lightly before he opened them once again.

"Kiss me.", he mumbled.

"What?"

"I want to come with you to the hospital tomorrow and I want you to kiss me."

I softly laid my lips upon his in a short kiss and got up to continue packing as my back faced him. Next thing I knew I was pushed against the nearest wall as Harry feverishly attached his lips to mine.