Lust in the Mosh Pit | A Jared Dines Story

Give Up and Get Out

      I went limp and steadied my breathing, my ribs felt sore from trying to hold back. Jared laid back and put his hands behind his head.

    "Well, thank you, for that.." I whispered with an awkward smile.

    "Any time." He responded with a wink. I pulled him over so that his head rested on my chest and one of his legs rested between mine.  I flipped off his snapback and started playing with his hair. "Shouldn't this be the other way around?" He asked looking up and me with a grin.

    "Ssshhh, I like holding people." I replied, rolling my eyes. I stayed up thinking for about an hour and I felt Jared go limp, indicating he had finally fallen asleep. Things with him were easy intimately. Nothing seemed awkward but also not too serious, which was refreshing for me. Things with Dylan were usually beyond awkward but I never really considered it a deal breaker because my sex drive was usually low anyways. I took one last glance at the clock and saw it was three in the morning again. I sighed, knowing I would have to get my sleep schedule back on track once they left tomorrow.

     It was about five in the morning when the This Is Halloween instrumental came blaring from my phone speakers. I quickly locked my phone, ending the call. I peeled Jared from my side and headed out to the back porch to call the person back. I looked at the missed call and sighed.

    "Fuckin' Dylan..." I muttered to myself as I hit the call back button.

    "Hey, what the fuck is going on? Huh?" I could tell by his voice, he clearly wasn't sober.

    "What do you mean? Are you okay?" I answered back in a concerned tone.

    "Why are those two guys still at the fucking house? I saw your YouTube videos from earlier, Kyle showed me. I bet you already fucked both of them, right?" Dylan said almost in tears.

    "Woah, woah, calm down. This isn't you talking, you're just messed up right now. I haven't slept with either of them and even so, it wouldn't matter if I had because you told me earlier that we were taking a break. You slept with Tori the last time you said that, remember? If that's not what is going on, then I need you to tell me that." I quickly responded, feeling guilty for my previous actions.

    "Yes, I said we needed a break again but.. but it feels different when I know you could be doing something with someone else." I stayed quiet, not knowing what to say. I mean I understood what he meant, but there shouldn't be a double standard. "I think you should move out." Dylan said breaking me from my thoughts. 

   "Excuse me, what?" I asked in disbelief, "How are you going to pay to stay in this house by yourself? Are you even thinking about what you're saying right now?" I asked, my feelings turning from sympathy to anger.

   "Kyle said he would move in with me and take care of everything." Dylan said defensively.

    "Oh my God, honey, Kyle is fucking using you, please see that. Please tell me that you can see that? If you let him move in with you and shit goes down with a bad deal, what are you going to do? Do you think he won't pin shit on you if the law gets involved?" I asked, trying to break through to him. I knew he was hard headed but I didn't think he'd let Kyle manipulate him this much.

    "Alex, move out. Tomorrow. Give up on him." Kyle yelled before the call was ended. I knew he wouldn't be able to afford anything and Kyle would use that to his advantage, but I didn't want it to be my mess anymore. Dylan was two months shy of being 21 years old, I couldn't protect him anymore. I walked back to my room and watched Jared sleeping soundly from the doorway. I knew Dylan wasn't stupid. He had to have seen the signs between Jared and I. While I knew that Jared was my mistake, I also knew that the drugs were his. It takes compromise to make things work and that was something he'd never do.

      I had decided just to stay up the rest of the night and plan for packing up in the later morning after the guys had left. I decided not to tell them about everything for fear of ruining the new friendships with oversharing. I waited till eight to start making breakfast which was eggs and chocolate chip pancakes. I had finished pouring three cups of coffee when Jared trudged into the kitchen still half asleep. 

    "Good morning." He said, wrapping his arms around my waist.

    "Good morning, stank breath." I laughed quietly and tried to shrug him off in order to clean the pans and spatula. I didn't have to clean them at the moment, but being in his grasp felt off from this early morning's events.

    "Thank you for breakfast, you really didn't have to do this." Jared said taking a bit of his pancakes.

    "I thought this would be nicer than just grabbing some McDonalds on your way home." I said, sitting next to him. I took a sip from my coffee and saw his facial expression change out of the corner of my eye. Austin woke up thirty minutes later and reheated his food an coffee. Making small talk was difficult but I tried my best to subtly get them to leave. When they were finally out the door, I sunk with my back against the wood. I started crying for reasons that I didn't even know. Did I fuck up? Was I overreacting about Dylan going to Kyle's? Other people we knew did drugs and I didn't give them shit for it. I went back and forth, arguing with myself in my head for two hours while I packed up my belongings. I was putting my last few belongings in my mid sized SUV when I got a call from an unknown number. "Hello?" I answered, my voice sounding nasally from crying.

    "Hey, it's Jared. I made it home alive. I just wanted to make sure you were okay and that we're still good? You seemed really distant this morning." He said sounding concerned.

   "Yeah, I'm good!" I responded, trying to sound a bit more chipper, "My lack of sleep was just finally catching up to me, I guess." I laughed. We talked for about five more minutes before I made an excuse to hang up. I decided I could afford to stay in a motel for a week while I looked for apartments.