school of bangtan | bts crackfic

detention

the popular kid, jimin looks around the room and questions to himself. "why the hell am I here? I'm a good kid...oh wait. its because of those girls chasing me in the courtyard and ran over the principal." 

the bad boy, yoongi stares at the desk intensely and carves his name into it. he looks up and questions, "why am I- psh I know. I lit the bathroom on fire." 

the intelligent student, namjoon plays around with his pencil and spins it back and forth. "how did I get here? ohhh its because i was watching porn without the headphones in at the library..." 

class president, seokjin takes a mirror out looks at his reflection. "is this because i skipped class just so i could look at my reflection? I looked great!" 

the quarterback of the football team, jungkook fidgets with his letter on his varsity jacket. "ok sure i got into a fight with the captain of the lacrosse team, but that sport sucks anyway. footballs better." 

the weirdo, tae looks up at the ceiling and spoke out loud. "IM NOT A BAD KID." everyone jumps to his voice. 

"dude shut up, im trying to think about my actions." jungkook says rolling his eyes.

"i didn't even get to reminiscence of why im here!" class clown, hoseok yells at him. 

"yo jhorse? no one gives a shit about your problems." yoongi responds back. hoseok swings a pencil at him and it hits his nose. 

"you're fucking dead." yoongi scowls. he jumps out of his seat and lunges over hoseoks desk and grabs his collar, forcing him to fall out of the desk. 

"AHH AHHHH!!!" hoseok screams in a high pitched voice while under  yoongi. 

"stop! stop!!" tae yells at them. 

"shut up kid. I got this." jungkook responds. tae looks at him and gets up from his desk,

"excuse me, mr. jeon? thats rude. IM OLDER THAN YOU." tae points at him and disciplines.

"I was born in busan so ha." he responds back and spits out his tongue. 

"oh hell no." jimin gets up and pushes jungkook in the chest. he doesn't budge. "i was born in busan first." 

"oh yea? then where's your jams?" jungkook smiles evilly.   

"theyre with youre mom!" jimin hurls jungkook. jungkook manages to get on top of him and ask, 

"whats with the mom jokes?" he laughs and they keep fighting. namjoon looks over to seokjin and asks,

"why do the cool guys always fight?" 

"why wouldn't they?" his eyes stay glued to his reflection. the room is filled with grunts from the fights and screams from hoseok. 

"STOP!!" tae screams and scratches the chalk board with his nails. everyone stops and covers their ears. 

"stop that shit!" yoongi yells. 

"my handsome ears!!" seokjin complains

"AHHH AHHHHH!" hoseok screams again. 

"i enjoy this." namjoon replies. 

"OUCH OWIEEEE" jimin screams. jungkook gets up and swipes tae's hand off the board. 

"you idiot." he rolls his eyes. tae ignores him and turns to the troubled boys. 

"now i know we all did something stupid to get ourselves in here," 

"nah im proud of what i did." yoongi smirks.

"shut up and let the kid speak." jungkook glares at yoongi. yoongi growls. 

"but we're all here for a reason! to become friends!" he smiles and poses cutely. yoongi gets up, marches to the front of the room and pushes him out of the way. 

"this bitch doesn't know what he's saying. im here for one reason," he points at namjoon.

"they're in love!" hoseok gasps.

"shut the fuck up and listen before i bust a cap in your ass...i want you to do my homework." 

"you're asking the kid who watched porn in public to do your homework?" jimin asks. namjoon slumps down in his seat of embarrassment. 

"sure, why not? he at least has the balls to watch it."

"your mom has the balls to watch it." jimin replies and jungkook laughs, 

"your roasts are so bad." 

"shut up jungcock!" seokjin yells. jungkook rolls his eyes. 

"i can't do it. I got in trouble for doing people's homework... i can tutor though." namjoon says.

"then what do the rest of us do?" jimin asks.

"you all become my slaves." yoongi smirks. everyone raises an eyebrow or looks at him confused.

"last time i checked, it's not the 18th century." seokjin says. 

"even though you're the class president, doesn't mean you can go against me."  yoongi responds and shrugs.

"slaves? what would we do for you? help you light the rest of the school on fire?" hoseok laughs. 

"i swear to god if you don't shut your fucking mouth..." 

"what are ya gonna do huh?" he smiles. yoongi pulls out a lighter. 

"light you instead." 

"ok im done with the jokes." hoseok surrenders fearfully.

"psh you're not man enough." jimin rolls his eyes. 

"says the one who takes ballet classes." yoongi laughs. the others join. 

"well, your-" 

"your mom takes ballet classes!" jungkook mocks and laughs. "you need to work on those roasts" 

"speaking of your mom, i fucked her last night." yoongi smiles. jimin sprints up to yoongi and starts pushing and shoving. the rest of the boys run up and huddle around trying to stop the fight. screams and cursing filling the room. a small red figure bursts out of the group and everyone steps back. fire combusts from the figure.

it was a lighter.  yoongi smirks. he chases the boys around the room. 

"BULTAOREUNE BITCHES!" 

a/n: new story alert. yes this is a crackfic and all of them are for fun. I just wanna give a smile to all you ARMY out there. *smiles* 

"okay bye bye"