school of bangtan | bts crackfic

the mirror pt. 1; the crime scene

"okay class. let's start on our papers."

hoseok looks down at the sheet in front of him. it read,

"rough draft"

"omigosh" he whispers

"i know, another paper again..." jimin replies sadly

"the papers been drafted?!?!"

"..."

"it must've been so traumatizing for you! tell me your stories!" he bends down to the level of the paper and places his ear on the surface.

"you're not that smart, you know that right?" jimin tells him, focusing on his paper.

"who me? yoongi tells me all the time, but only...not like that." he smiles and cups his head in his hands.

"makes sense."

seokjin walks over to their desks where they were seated and smacked a small compact mirror on the desk. hoseok jumps to the impact, jimins eyed the handsomeness angrily.

"can't you see i'm doing something!" jimin scolds and aggressively points a "boi" to his draft.

"IM HAVING A MID LIFE CRISIS."

"so...?"

"look for yourself!" he opens the compact and it reveals broken shards of reflective glass.

"whoa i look weird." hoseok laughs, moving his head around and looking at his multiple selves.

"yes hoseok we get it. you're ugly. but that's nOT THE PROBLEM." seokjin yells, forcing the class to look at him.

"ow." hoseok raises a finger and the shard of glass he was just looking at, found itself a home in his thumb. he taps seokjin with his index.

"what do you wan- hoseok!! leave the glass alone!" jin yells, snatching his hand and examining the wound.

"no. my feelings are hurt. i'm fine!" hoseok snatches his hand away and pulls out the shard oh-so-easily.

"you idiot!" jin scolds. "my mirror is GoNe!!" he breaks down and cries at jimins desk.

"the fuck is wrong with this dude?" yoongi turns around from his chair and points at seokjin casually.

"why do you care?" jimin questions

"because i'm hard at work over here. i need to focus." yoongi replies. confused, hoseok gets up and peeks at his paper. it read

"sugas list of mischief"

hoseok pats him on the back.

"don't fucking touch me."

"im surprised you know how to spell mischief!" he smiles. yoongi looks at him and smacks his face.

"i'm surprised your still living after that remark." he turns around and returns back to his mischief.

"MY LIFE IS rUiNEd" jin cries into his arms.

"shut him up! i'm actually working over here." namjoon says, obviously annoyed.

"on what? finding new hentai?" jungkook laughs and switches his focus on the boys.

"THATS NOT THE PROBLEM." jin screams, tears matted on his face.

"than what is? you're mirror broke?" jungkook jokes.

"actually, yes. i'm loosing my mind." he breathes in and out, attempting to calm himself.

"you never had a mind  in the first place." jimin says annoyed. everyone laughs at his joke.

"see jimin hyung? now that's a good roast!" jungkook smacks his back and jimin laughs.

"i'm backkkkk" tae sings. he walks into the room and rubs his hands on his pants, wet from the washroom.

"that was a long ass shit."

"language." tae walks past yoongi, no eye contact made. at this point, he became his mother now. yoongi stuck out his tongue and turns around again, returning to the list.

"taehyung DID YOU BREAK MY MIRROR?!" seokjin pins him up against the wall.

"this is getting interesting." yoongi smirks.

"whoa whoa WHOA." jungkook sprints to the back of the class where everyone was located. he shoves seokjin out of the way.

"no ones supposed to pin him down, except me!" he yells. the classroom goes silent. taehyung smirks slightly.

"for the first time in forever, the pervert here ISNT joon." yoongi laughs.

"hEY!!" namjoon yells and hits yoongi. yoongi grabs his wrist and growls,

"touch me one more time and instead of a rap monster you'll be a 'dead monster'."

"oh yea?? what's a little suga gonna do to me?"

yoongi laughs sarcastically and his smile quickly changes into a angry growl.

"fuck you." he says

"you wish"

"that's it!!" he lunges at him and pushes him to the ground. the teacher peeks over his newspaper and gets up and marches over to the scene. everyone pauses and shakes in fear. he looks down at the, now paused, fighting koreans on the ground.

"before you say anything, sir, i-" namjoon says, nervously before tae screams and intervenes,

"GET HIM GET HIM!"
the teachers glare switches to him. tae raises his hands in surrender.

"that's my line! GET HIM! SMACK THE SHIT OUTTA HIM!" the teacher replies. the screaming and cheers continue throughout the classroom along with the fight.

seokjin drops his compact and throws a fit. jungkook grabs his shoulders and turns him to the point where he's facing him and attempts to speak over the yells.

"GET A GRIP WOMAN!" he smacks the handsome man.

"excuse me, jungcock? IMMA SNATCH YOUR WEAVE"

"i dare you."

"BOI IF YOU DONT GET YOUR UGLY ASS LOOKING COCONUT HEAD ASS OUTTA HERE I SWEAR TO YOUR MOMMA IMMA————"

—-————————————-

"the rest is too vulgar for you, pure children." jungkook's  future wife says sadly.

"but momma!!"

"moral of part one of this story, don't break your mirror or ask papers about their war stories. we'll continue tomorrow."

"so what happened to daddy??"

"he could never have children again."

"wait. then what are we?"

"adopted."