[COMPLETED] the first ; 첫 (SVT Vernon X Reader)

38: What's your name?

Hi!!! SO, since that month-long update, WE GOT 2000+ NEW READS!!! ALDKJFOFEMG IMAGINE ME LOSING MY SHIT Y'ALLS LMAOOOOO ANYWAYS~ I did not wait for Chapter 37's 300th read, HERE'S THE 38TH! THANK YOU EVERYONE! 💕

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Pre-Chapter Note

HI! I DECIDED, JUST TO GIVE ME ENOUGH GUTS LMAO, THAT I'LL UPDATE ONCE EVERY LATEST CHAPTER GETS 300 READS. THANK YOU. ❤

ONCE THE 37TH REACHES 300 READS, THIS CHAPTER, 38TH, WILL AUTOMATICALLY BE PUBLISHED. SAME GOES FOR THE REST.

KAMSAHAEYO!

End of Pre-Chapter Note
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It took quite a while to calm you down. You are now sipping some fresh tea, while your brother sat beside you, quietly watching your every move.
You do not mind.

"You must've been so afraid."
You felt your chest heave with every sob, sending your whole body to a pain you never could have imagined. You know only stopping would make the pain go away.
Instead, you cried harder.
Aerin just kept on whispering comforting words, and they worked, they did, you just can't stop bawling your fears out.
Yes. You've been so, so afraid.
Ever since you accepted that you do deserve Hansol, that it would be okay to openly love him as much as you do, you started having thoughts of events like this. You thought about what ifs, all of them resulting to you, destroying everything he worked hard for. You knew that isn't gonna be healthy, so you just kept them buried, at the back of your mind.
Buried, but not forgotten.
You should have known better than to be comfortable like that.
You were still crying as hard, having these thoughts now, when eventually, the door opened.
"Ah. I knew it."
"Joon-oppa." Aerin acknowledged him before you do, gently breaking off your hugs to give him a bow. "Annyeonghaseumnikka." (Hello.)
You immediately stopped crying. It's a reflex - whenever you see your brother, or whenever your brother sees you, in no way should he see you crying. You taught yourself to always be happy in front of him, as a silent way of giving thanks for taking care of you all these years.
He was still in his suit and tie, so clearly, he went to Korea straight from work.
"Hey."
"Hey, Big Bro."
He walked towards you, and sat beside your bed. Aerin politely got the bag you did not notice he was holding, and he silently thanked her.
"You're not okay, obviously. Not happy, either. How are you holding up?"
"Barely." Your voice was supposed to crack again, but you tried to keep your composed self.
"Ah, my sister has grown up. Look at her, trying so hard not to cry."
"Yah."
"Come 'ere."
Your brother hugged you, which you so gratefully returned. Tears started flowing again, but you aren't sobbing anymore.
This is the kind of crying where you just let the tears flow, lifting off your heavy chest, and eventually accepting that you will be alright.
He hugged you for as long as you held onto him, and when you decided it was enough, you'll be okay, you let go.
Just in time, Aerin came up to you with a cup of tea in hand.

Now, everyone's quiet, you, with your tea, and Aerin and Joon watching you.
After you put down the cup on your lap, just momentarily feeling its warmth on your palms, your brother spoke up.
"What are you gonna do now?"
"I'm going to Jeju."
"Until the end of your Visa?"
"Yeah."
"Okay."
"Okay?" You can't believe your brother isn't contradicting any of this.
"Hmm." Wow. He really is okay with it.
"Wait."
"Yes?"
"There's a catch." With your brother, there's always a catch.
He smiled at you. "I'll be with you till the end of your Visa."
Oh. Oh.
"B-but-"
"Ever since you called to tell me you met those boys for real and implied that you've been seeing them on a daily basis whatsoever, I've prepared for this. You ain't got a word now. I told you to be safe, I told you to be happy. You, right now, are neither of those things. Now, tell me to shut up."
You didn't. All he said were true.
"That's what I thought."

Hours later, after some more tests and more money, you've been discharged. You all went home, no, back to Aerin's house to prepare your stuff.
"You aren't going to say goodbye?" Aerin asked you, in the middle of folding your clothes.
"Goodb- oh." She meant SEVENTEEN.
"I kind of gave them the impression that I was just a simple fan, didn't I, Eonni? Let's just say this fan was contented with all of that and wishes nothing more. A second meetup would be miracle."
She just nodded, quietly telling you she understood.
"You're leaving him on air."
"The air wasn't real."
"Oh, yeah, tell yourself that."
"Better I'm shot down instead of him." You quietly replied, your fears beginning to eat you again.

Going with your brother, the two of you eventually bid Aerin your goodbyes, with her promise of not telling SEVENTEEN, and Hansol, not even Seungcheol, the truth about what happened to you, and what you did with it.
Not too long after, you landed to Jeju, where your ever-so-prepared brother got a whole house, more than decent enough, to live in while spending the rest of your Visa there. It was just in front of the sea, better yet.
Upon approaching said house, your brother quickly cooked spaghetti for both of you, and opened up an ice cream quart for you to glob on.
"Comfort food." He explained.
You smiled. "Thank you."
You two just ate quietly, occasionally making small talk, about the company, your mother, and many more little things.
After eating, you got on with the dishes, your brother aware how you feel with the activity. Later on, you walked towards the doorway.
"Where are you going?"
You were putting on your shoes, while he was rearranging some groceries on the refrigerator.
"Just outside."
"Be careful."
"Got you."
"And bring your phone."
"I will."
You headed out, with music blasting off your ears. You found a good log to sit on, so you did.
As songs played and ended, you just sat there, watching the calm sea. It seemed to be matching your mood, its waves a complete reflection of your emotions.
At that moment, you are the sea, and the sea is you.
You embraced the new found calmness of being away with him, embraced the sense of safety now that you are not hovering over him like a dark cloud, ready to wreak storm every passing moment.
You were a stray bullet, and you are happy to be away from him, if it meant he'd never bleed because of you.
His safety, in all forms, is all that matters to you.

The log moved, you quickly checked your surroundings, which was previously muted with respect to your playlist.
You removed your earphones, but they fell all the way, both your hands, trembling.
This can not be happening.
He picked them up, putting one bud in his ear.
"Y-you're a Carat."
A dizzying wave of dejávu hit you like thunder.
"H-how-"
"Hi, I'm Hansol! :) What's your name?"
Hansol's here. In Jeju.
With you.

¤~*×♡×*~¤

YEP. YES. I'M NOT SORRY.