Unrequited

Chapter Seven: The Sudden Event

Hazel's POV:

What's going on right now?

I was leaving my English class, stepping out of the building. Then I was suddenly pulled away to the back of the building, and now some random guy from my pre-calc class is in front of me, asking me out.

To be honest, I never really knew this guy on a personal level. I don't even remember what his name was. He sits behind me, and he's in some of my other classes too. The most communication that we've had is saying hi and doing some group projects. I fiddle with my necklace, I'm blushing so much. Not because I'm embarrassed, but because I don't know how to tell him no.

I've dated some guys, but it doesn't last longer than a few months. But these are guys that I know, guys that I got close to before they asked me out. This guy is just some random stranger as far as I know. Thank goodness he asked me out in private, well kinda. I can see his friends hiding behind the building next to me.

Normally I would just say yes and get the few months over. But this last year of high school, I want to spend more time with Dylan before we go our separate ways. I've never had to reject a guy before. Much less heard that they want to go out with me, it's only happened twice. I wonder how he would feel, if I was rejected by the person I like...I would feel devastated.

"You're planning on rejecting me," he says quietly, "aren't you."

"Um," I reply, "kinda."

"It's okay," he sighs, "I knew this was gonna happen. My friends told me to ask you out before it was too late. I understand, its fine."

I feel so bad for Chris-that's what his name was-I want to do something for him. But saying "we can still be friends" would hurt him even more. So, without thinking, I do the unthinkable.

I peck him on his cheek, and say thanks. Quickly I turn around and run as fast as I can. I run past a few buildings before being stopped by a strong grip on my wrist. I tug and tug but the person just won't let go. I turn around, frustrated and about to yell but then I realize who it is.

I look at his saddening eyes, both searching for answers in my eyes. I can see his clenched jaw, wanting to scream and yell, but patiently waiting for an answer instead. His tight grip on my wrist hasn't loosed nor tightened. But just looking at Dylan's sad face makes my heart want to break into a million pieces.

Feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders make my knees buckle beneath me, and I crumple onto the cracked asphalt beneath me. After a few seconds of hesitation, I let the first tear fall. Then a gush of wet droplets race down my puffy flustered cheeks. I can't stop the tears from making their way out of my watery eyes. No matter how hard I try, I let the groans and cries escape my hoarse throat. I told my knees in and hug them to my chest, hoping that this position will help me overcome my sadness. But, it seems to only encourage more tears to free themselves. I'm about to lie down and continue my mental breakdown, but then he softly wraps his arms around me.

He feels like he wants to hug me, but he doesn't want to disturb me. His hug feels comforting and welcoming, yet silent and distant. I want him to hug me tighter, so I snuggle closer to him, and he pulls me closer toward him. He feels so warm, his hug tighter but not harmful. Like "Ferdinand the bull". Such a strong being, but such a caring personality. I never want this moment to end. I just want to stay here, cradled in his arms, believing that nothing could ever hurt me in his embrace. I stopped crying a while ago, but he doesn't let go, and neither do I. We just sit there, in the middle of the walkway, hugging. No talking, no awkwardness, nothing. Just two people embracing one another's company.

But reluctantly, I pull away. Not because I want to, but because if I don't go home soon, my parents will start to worry. He looks at me confused, then nods understandingly. He gets up first, and holds a hand out to help me up. Carefully, I take it and push myself off of the hard and raged asphalt. Brushing dry dirt off of my jeans, I look up at him. He isn't looking at me, he's staring at the wall beside him, slightly blushing. I stare at the ground in front of my feet, and without looking up, I take his hand. His head immediately snaps to the side so he can face me, and stares at our intertwined fingers. His hand is bigger than I imagined, however its much softer than I had predicted. Slowly, I turn away from him, and lead him out of school grounds.

We walk to his car and he helps me get in. Then, after entering the vehicle, he starts to drive in the direction of my house. Neither of us say anything for a few minutes, then he's the one to break the deafening silence.

"I'm sorry." he says so quietly it's basically a whisper.

"For what?" I ask in the same manner.

"For getting mad at you," he answers, "you didn't deserve that, you didn't even have time to explain."

"It's fine," I reply, "you don't have to apologize."

"Then may I ask you to explain?" he asks in a silent manner.

"Explain what?" I squeak, as quiet as a mouse.

"Why you kissed him."

"Huh?" I ask, louder than expected. "I didn't kiss him."

"Yeah you did, you pecked him on the cheek."

"Because I felt bad about rejecting him," I answer softly, "he seemed really heart broken about it."

"Oh," is all Dylan says.

There's no more conversation for the rest of the car ride. When we stop in front of my house, I take off my seat belt and hold my bag in my lap. I open the car door slowly, about to get out, but then I turn around and peck him on the cheek. He turns to look at me, there's shock and surprise in his expression. But I turn around and run into the house before he can comment.

Why on earth did I do that? Now everything's going to be super awkward between us. But...it doesn't feel like a total loss. I can't stop smiling right now. I've tried thinking of the saddest thing, but even that can't stop my from grinning like a fool. I don't regret what I did, I'm just embarrassed about it. But that doesn't stop me from cheering and screaming on the inside. I'm proud, I'm glad I did it, I don't regret it, I won't ever regret it. Even if it's the last time I will ever see him, I don't care. It was worth it, he is always worth it.