Waiting To Be Found (Jalex)

Remembering Sunday

Chapter Three.

Title from Remembering Sunday by All Time Low.

The rain fell almost systematically. Beautifully as the unexplainable smell of rain filled the air around me. Something was so pure about rainfall and the smell it produced, like the world was being cleansed.
That day I had rushed to get home, walking in my quick pace as I clutched my book to my chest as if it were protecting it from the rain. The rain I wasn't too eager to hide from in the first place. I spent that morning and most of the afternoon reading a book by the river, it was a small part on the river that was empty today and I was very lucky to get there before many of my classmates did. The afternoon humidity had been almost unbearable, it had been building and building until I knew that we would either have a storm or we would all suffocate in the heat. I got up as soon as I heard thunder, and not very long after that while I was on my way back, I was quickly caught up in the cooling drops of water that seemed to hydrate and revive every bit of life around me.
After hours of reading, I found myself wanting to read even more. My parents were concerned, and I knew it even though they hardly ever spoke of my lacking social abilities. No matter how much they urged me to befriend someone, I knew that they were just afraid to have a son that was not just like everyone else there. In a small town like that, it's almost a crime to  be different from the others.

No one ever said anything to me, though, and no one ever pointed out the fact that my only friends consisted of books, clean paper and pencils.

There was something addictive about lifting the cover of a book and reading and reading until the spine cracked with such a beautiful sound, it made me never want to stop reading. As a child, I read anything and everything I could get my hands on, and not much had changed. The closest humans I had to friends were the older women that worked in the library.

As I walked home in the rain, there was something in the distance that made me squint my eyes to see. Something familiar and yet heart attack inducing. I pulled in a sharp intake of breath and felt my knees and hands begin to uncontrollably tremble. It was the closest to an adreneline rush I had been.
The beautiful boy that I had only seen once was riding his bike in my direction. As he got closer it was easier to see him, he looked as if he had bathed in all of his clothes. His dark hair was sticking to his forehead in a way that made my stomach flip again and again.

The closer he got to me, the more beautiful he became. His pale, yet darker-than-me complexion was stunning, and there wasn't a way to describe the way every molecule of oxygen left my lungs when his lips curled gently at the edges and he formed a smile that I wanted to photograph and keep in a box of everything that keeps me sane.

When our eyes locked, that fire I had been trying to avoid lighting was well past lit and it was a burning flame, hungry for much more than I could give it.

His eyes instantly became my favorite color, and I wanted nothing more than to swim in them.

***

The moment my eyes landed on Jack, my Jack, the summer Jack, my love, Jack I was unable to stop my mouth from opening and my eyes widening.
His lips parted lightly as his eyes widened as well.

His beautiful, captivating eyes that were exactly the same from the first moment I saw them.
I could pick his eyes out alone, in a sea of other eyes, I could never forget them.

I wanted to tell him this, I wanted to tell him that I saw them in the back of my mind every single day, that I doodled them on every single one of my sketch pads, that I dreamed of his eyes begging for me the way they once did. I wanted to tell him that I had waited thirteen years to see him again, thirteen years to look into his eyes and be home again, to be whole again. I wanted him to know that his hands were the first things I would go to when I didn't know what to draw, that his hands that held me so firmly were all I could think about when I saw anyones hands.