Can I Have Your Attention Please

Chapter 36: Spoiled

PLEASE PLAY THIS SONG THROUGHOUT THIS CHAPTER! I LOVE IT WITH ALL MY HEART!

QOC: What's your dream college/university (if you plan on going)? I don't know how the education systems work in other countries, so I'm talking from the U.S' POV. I personally want to attend Penn State.

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Sam's POV
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Money.

It controls the way people think, and it controls the way people do. It's manipulative and evil, and personally (sometimes), I wish it didn't exist. It's brainwashing, and I know it's had to of hurt a lot of people in many different ways.

Just think about it. If money wasn't around, there wouldn't be theft. The downside to that is that our system would go haywire, and crime could skyrocket because there's nothing stopping people from taking things from one another.

But another upside is that The Hawkeye wouldn't be here on this planet. The only reason it's here is because Mr. Ryhawks wants money. That's it. So no money means no fight club. No fight club means Kason wouldn't have to go through so much turmoil.

I want this to sink in with people:

Kason could give me ten dollars, and another guy could give me twenty. If I were a snobby, bitchy rat who chose the other dude because he gave me more money, then I'd be ten dollars richer. I would feel that the other man is better because he gave me more.

But the man has two hundred dollars, and all Kason had was the ten.

My point is, Kason gives his everything to do his best to make me happy and safe. What would any other boy do? They will never love me like he loves me. And I will never love anyone like I love him. He gives me all his affection and protection, while others would merely give me a small portion of what care they could offer. Understand?

I just don't want him to give it all to me. He's going to waste it. I'm going to be gone, and he'll have given me his everything. Then what will he be left with?

Nothing.

I don't want him to be an empty, hollow shell. I want him to be happy and I want him to move on. I want him to find love with a woman who will live on with him forever. I can't be the reason he's wasted all the good he can give.

So I won't let him waste it.

And no, I'm not being dramatic and saying, "Oh woe is me! He should never speak to me for the greater good of our emotions!"

No, I'd want to kill myself before cancer does if I didn't have Kason by my side. But if he's going to devote so much compassion and love to me, I have to make him spend it right. I have to stop sitting around in this bedroom, making him worry about my health or the next time I'm going to vomit or cough up blood.

It's time to take care of him. Because sure, he's taking care of me. But who's loving him? Who's caring for him?

I have to.

I glance over at the alarm clock and read the time. It's currently five twenty-two in the morning, and Kason arrives in eight minutes to give me some medicines that are supposed to help ease my muscle pain.