Wattpad's Stupidest Stereotypes

Werewolves

1. The main guy is the Alpha in 99% of the stories. Always. He's dominant, possessive, cocky, and yet oh so sexy. And almost invariably, he's described as an ass, jerk or d**k in the description or first few chapters. I gotta get me some of that. Not.

2. The word Alpha is in loads of the titles. "The Alpha Jerk", "My Alpha", "The Alpha's Mate"*... Do I even need to comment?

3. Alright. This one, along with the next, offends me on a personal level. Positions in the pack are Alpha, Beta, third in command, and then the rest are just normal. Maybe, if we're lucky, they'll throw us a bone (excuse the pun) and have an omega. Why? Just why?

4. Ok, so. Just.. Third in command. I'm sorry, I have to use italics writing that piece of overused stupidity. Like, has everybody writing a story on werewolves read only Twilight? It goes Alpha, Beta, Gamma, Delta. Maybe I'm just being weird and nobody cares, but like does nobody wonder where the word alpha came from? Sheesh.

5. All werewolves have anger management problems. Like, in my opinion, that's speciesist. Just because they turn into hulking canine beasts.. The injustice!

6. All of the main guys have "sexy" names with letters that score ten in scrabble. Jax, Xavier, Zander.. The list goes on. Wherever have all the normal names gone? I like the name Michael. Maybe Adam. (Hint hint, to anyone about to write a story)

7. The werewolf(s) has a "wolf" inside his/her head, that somehow speaks English. Not only that, but they never take over. It's like, they're just prancing around in the guy's head. Why in the name of all that is chocolatey are they even there?

8. Speaking of which, said wolves are always more civilised than their human counterparts. Just..

Let me set the scene. It's the main guy's perspective, just after seeing the girl for the first time.

Wolf (let's call him Michael =D): Mate! Mate! I love her so much, she's perfect.

Guy (How about Adam?): Wow, I want to do unspeakable things to her. Hang on, she's standing within ten feet of another guy. Grrrr.. She's mine. Why is she doing that? Why does she disrespect me?

Michael: Let's be respectful to our mate. We need to give her space, and be loving to her.

It seems to me that some light bedtime reading on wolves would not go astray. Let's just be real for a second here..

9. The mate is a choice of four.

A: The alpha of alphas. Oh, so a simple alpha isn't enough?

B: The prince of the werewolf kingdom. Original.

C: The alpha of the biggest pack in the world, spanning over half of either Europe or America. Yet, notice there are still only the alpha, beta and third in command to uphold the rules. Werewolves actually existing would actually seem probable compared to that working out.

D: The alpha of the rogue pack. I just.. Rogue pack. They cancel each other out. Rogues, in case you didn't know, are wolves that go out on their own. Please, somebody, explain to me why they're in a pack?

10: The girl is human, but, wait for it, special. Always. Either the only human mate since the dawn of time, or a reincarnation of the first wolf; or the daughter of the Moon Goddess, or an incarnation of the Moon Goddess herself. There are so many special girls that a normal one would be a phenomenon.

*I made these titles up in my head on the spot. I can't ever remmber seeing a title with that exact name, and I apologise to anyone who reads this if they have a name that is that story.