Why We Can't Be Together ✔

Mr. Perfect

Dear Mr. Perfect,

Even to this day, I still consider you one of the most perfect guys I have ever met − to ever have the pleasure of being with. I'm still trying to convince myself that what I did, what I sacrificed, was the right thing to do. 

I love you; I will always love you until the end of my days.

You, my love, are my first true love; my best friend; my partner in crime.

I love you to no end; I would sacrifice many things to be with you, to be near you. It was a love so intense that even I couldn't comprehend. I needed to be with you; I needed to be close to you; I needed to be appreciated and to be loved and to have that affection.

When I first met you, you were a simple but interesting guy. You sparked my attention with the way you talked; how smooth every syllable came out of your lips; how easy it was for you to speak in public; how you took control of the situation; how easily I was able to talk to you.

You were different from the guys I was used to: You were engaged; you were mature; you were talented.

I never met anyone like you.

I was resentful of you. I hated when people try to control me and the situation where I was perfectly capable of taking control of. 

You wouldn't let me have a say in things; you embarrassed me. I had to show I was worthy, in a sense; I had to prove to you and to myself that I could stand on my own two feet.

You were amused by me; you were in awe of me.

I am easy to get along with as long as you're not an arrogant ass.

You replied instantly; I wasn't used to that.

You were engaged in conversations with me.

The first time we hung out in person, I initiated. It was a bold move on my part. I wanted to try to be different. I didn't have a lot of friends, and you showed me that you were considerate and nice. You actually came.

You thought I thought that you were a loner, but it was actually because I was the loner. I had no one.

After all, you did help me with my assignment. I should at least get to know you. Your skills may be needed again.

Fast forward: we became very good friends. We texted all the time; we met up at least once a day; we hung out at each other's places. It was an amazing friendship that we had.

You would stay over until 2 in the morning to talk with me, to help me with my homework.

I knew − I don't know exactly when − I was falling for you. Hard.

I knew I liked you; how you were intelligent; the way that you think about ideas, objects, your surroundings. You made me see the beauty in things I never noticed before; you made me notice a lot of things. 

You weren't afraid of anything; you weren't afraid to be close to me; you weren't afraid to say what you were feeling; you weren't afraid to do what was needed to be done, even if it backfired on you. You were courageous. I appreciated that; I liked that.

Fast forward (again): I told you I liked you. A month after knowing you, I told you that I had feelings for you, that I thought about being in a relationship with you.

Your past relationships troubled me; you assured me that it was okay; you got over it; you were done with that part of your life.

However, that's not what broke us up. There were too many factors in play that set us apart. We were different; we were two people going on very different stages in our lives; we were going through different career paths mentally and physically.