I Love You Ms. J!

Chapter 10: Awkward Feeling!

           

I started to take off my shirt, then felt slightly weird suddenly. Bella would see me in my underwear. Why did that bother me so much? I didn't have anything special on, it would probably ruin whatever image of me she had in her head. But I pushed those thoughts out of my head and changed as quickly as possible. I could feel her eyes on me the whole time, or at least that's what my imagination was telling me. When I turned to look at her, she was carefully looking my brother's pants on the floor.

"Well?" I gave a shrug feeling so awkward in the dress.

Bella stared at me. I could feel my face grow hot with her gaze. "You're so cute!"

"I am not." I said defensively. I knew I wasn't cute as a girl.

"Yes you are. All you need is... hold on."

She got up and started messing with my hair. Not since my mother had anyone styled my hair like that. It was a bit nostalgic. I guess girls do this all the time, if I had girl friends in high school I might have not thought this was a big deal.

She added a bit of color to my lips, then dragged me to a full body mirror that was attached to a closet door. I looked into it and saw some tomboyish looking girl standing next to Bella.

I wasn't as cute as Bella made out I was but she was right... I looked better than I thought.

"See I told you." Bella giggled, then leaned her head against mine as we looked into the mirror.

"This is the first time I've dressed like a girl since... I can't remember."

"You wore a school uniform, right?"

"Yeah, but that doesn't count. I wore tights underneath my skirt." I told her.

"You're cute." Bella repeated. "It's also a bit- I shouldn't say it. Sorry, forget I said anything."

Of course with a lead in like that, I couldn't let that go. "What?"

"I asked you to forget it." Bella blushed and turned away from the mirror.

I followed her. "C'mon, it can't be any more embarrassing than undressing for you."

I didn't mean it to sound like that, but as usual I blurt things out.

Bella looked even more embarrassed when I said that, and I knew that she was watching me, even if I didn't catch her. Oddly, I didn't feel as embarrassed as I did when I changed.

"Well then... if you put it that way.... I was just thinking that... that..." Bella was stumbling over her own words. Somehow I thought it was cute, and caught myself thinking that. Had I really completely given into this kind of world? "...I was thinking that it's actually a bit s-s-s-exy that you're wearing my clothes."

I looked at her in disbelieve. She hid her face.

"Don't laugh at me!"

"I'm not laughing."

"It's weird of me to say, I know, I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry, I prompted it out of you, it's my own fault."

She thought I was sexy. Me. As a girl. I couldn't stop myself, I had to know. "Do you like me better like this or in boy clothes?"

Bella, still looked pink in the face. Maybe I shouldn't have asked her right after she admitted something so mortifyingly personal. But I wanted to know.

"I think you're cute both ways." Bella admitted, though I thought that was a crap answer.

"Could you kiss me like this?" Woah, what am I saying?

Bella walked back to me, with a serious look on her face. "Do you want me too?"

We were facing each other, our chest almost touching we were so close. Her body heat surged from her person like a heater. I could see nothing but those eyes. Those eyes I could drown in every time they studied at me.

"Do you?" She whispered. She was breathing heavy. So was I. She wanted to hear me tell her I wanted her too. Those piercing eyes scrutinizing my every thought.

"Yes." My voice cracked, sounding slightly expecting.

And she did. She led me backwards, and my back pressed against the wall next to the mirror, her body meshed with mine as she pressed her lips into mine. Her eyes momentarily peered into me, before they shut to enjoy the moment. I found mine did as well.

Her mouth opened slightly during the kiss, inviting me in. My brain turned off and I followed instincts. Looking back now, I can't believe I was the first one to place my tongue into her mouth. But it was as if she were waiting for it, and greeted it with a passionate affection.

So this was what it was like to make-out. I had wondered. Bella's arms wrapped around my neck and her fingers went through my hair as she kissed me. My own arms were around her waist, my left a bit lower than my right, almost touching her behind.

Bella pulled away and I found that I missed her, though oxygen was welcomed. We looked into each other's eyes, realizing that this wasn't just a fling anymore. I wanted her and she wanted me.

"You can touch me, you know." She said. I wasn't sure what she meant, and it showed on my face. "Your hands... you can... you know."

I realized that she wanted me to let go of the remaining restraint I was feeling. She wanted me to ravage her. I didn't know if I could do that.

Bella giggled. "You're so shy. I'm the shy one remember?"

"Sorry." Though I do think it was a bit unfair. I was the one who started the french kiss.

Bella turned around and pressed her back to my front, grabbing my arms and pulled them around her waist. She leaned her head back and lean it against the side of cheek. "I sometimes fantasized about behind held like this. Being touched..." She told me, as if she was encouraging a child that it was okay to swim in shallow water. "...is that weird?"

"I don't think so."

Bella giggled. That laugh of hers was as addicting as her eyes. "Your heart is beating so fast, Jessica. So is mine." She pulled my hand up and placed it over her heart, just over her breast, then giggled again. "Your heart is pounding..."

"I can't help it." I couldn't. Bella's body seemed to tingle under my sensitive finger tips.

She leaned her head to the side exposing her neck. My body quivered. She wanted me to kiss her there. She wanted me to grope her from behind. This was really happening. Without a further thought I pressed my lips to her neck, the scent of her body and her hair filled my nose.

" Jessica." Bella whispered.