I Love You Ms. J!

Chapter 7: Self Confusion

           

Ken knew something was up the moment I got home. Of course he wanted to know the details of what happened, but I couldn't tell him. I didn't want him to tease me about it.

I couldn't get that kiss out of my mind the whole school break. Even though I went shopping for some proper girl clothes, I kept thinking about her.

I don't understand why Bella did that. I was too stupid that I didn't ask for her mobile number when we were out, so I was left in the dark. It didn't make sense. Bella was straight, right?

Then I had some doubts in my own mind. Was I straight? I mean all I could think about was that date after all. When thoughts of returning to school creeped their way in, I realized that I was far to nervous to put on the clothes I had bought. At least until I got my mind straight I needed to hide in my brothers clothes again. I'm pathetic.

When I returned to university later, I felt on edge. I didn't see Bella anywhere, but then again, I never had seen her before so I wasn't sure where to look.

I went into the ladies room to retreat even more with my confusion when I overheard a conversation.

"...but I know I saw Jessica in the park last Saturday. And he was with a girl."

"A girl, who was it?"

"Not sure, I didn't recognize her. But she probably goes to this school. If I saw her, I'd know her. She was really pretty."

"Jessica's been turning down everyone. I even heard he likes to give a lame excuse about being not being a man, like he's weak as a girl or something."

That's because I am a girl!

"Well he said yes to her. I saw her hand go up his shirt. Then they watched the sunset together."

"This sucks."

When they left I could feel my heart racing. So those kinds of things were being said about me. I left the bathroom feeling uncomfortable.

I should have just worn the damn dress I bought. As I was rounding the corner I stopped when I saw those gossiping girls. It seemed they were more successful in finding Bella than I was. I kept hidden again.

"Spill it Bella, how did you get Jessica to go out with you!"

"I just asked." Bella told them meekly.

"I did too but he said no." Another girl had complained but was ignored.

"Well... aren't you going to tell us anything about him?"

" Jessica  is... is like no man I've ever dated."

I literally slapped the front of my face. What kind of answer was that? Sure that was technically the truth, but saying it like that sounded so dirty.

" Jessica? You already call him that?"

"It seems more appropriate. I thought I might use Jessica next time, but I'm not sure if that will go over well."

"That sounds too girly."

I am a girl!

They pried and pried with Bella, but she only gave them vague answers. After a while, the girls must have sensed, as they gave up. When they had left Bella surprised me again. She seems to do that a lot.