Now Or Never

Chapter Twenty - Four

<3: Dedicated to SmackThatArse, cuz I'm selfish like dat...

Chapter Twenty - Four: 

"What do you want?" he asked dully, slowing down to stare at me. 

"I...I don't actually know," I admitted, looking down, "I just ran after you...because I thought you might need...a friend?" 

The last part of the sentence was disappointingly a question, because I didn't know if I qualified as his friend or not. I wasn't even sure if I considered him a friend. 

"Oh. Thanks." he finally responded, taking my hand to interlock with his. I was glad it was dark, because I was sure that my cheeks were red. 

I hated the fact that I blushed. I tried to act so tough, and show everyone I was strong. But the littlest degree of unexpected flirting could make these chubby cheeks rosy. Just kidding. They're not chubby. 

We walked in silence until we reached the same park we'd been to earlier. It was empty. And let me tell you, it looked creepy as hell at night. 

 We took a seat on the swings, tentatively kicking the ground. The creaky noises that ensued made the location seem worse. Unfortunately. 

"So..." I started, coughing awkwardly, "what was that about?" 

"I don't know. I guess we're not the picture perfect you thought we were." he replied, looking down. 

"Every family has problems. I just assumed you guys had normal ones."

"And how do you know that wasn't a normal problem? Just a minor issue?" he teased, smiling lightly.

"Ah, well...that's just me being my judgmental self." 

He chuckled at that, but a deaf person would know that it was fake.

"Now that I realize you successfully evaded the subject, can we skip back to the topic?" I asked. I hated myself for asking, because his smile fell immediately. 

"I guess...the core explanation would be...that Tamara isn't my mother." he stated, avoiding eye contact.

"Okay. Continue. Explain." I prodded.

"My parents divorced when I was three. Boo hoo. It never mattered. My mom got custody, and that was more than enough. She was awesome. I had a perfect childhood." he said, smiling distantly. 

"Was. If you don't want to continue, it's fine. I completely understand."

"No, no. You told me about yourself. It's only fair if you learn about me, too." he paused, seemingly realizing what he was about to do. 

Taking in a deep breath, he continued morosely, "She died three years ago. I was thirteen - almost fourteen. It was horrible. I didn't know my father. I'd only been aware of his name, and seen pictures. Not even a phone call. And then, suddenly, I'm moving in with him, and I'm seeing him all the time, and I see that he has a whole other family. A family that didn't want me."

He gasped as if everything was hurting him, and it probably was. "He already had Tamara, and the twins. It was so confusing, and I still get overwhelmed. I know it's weak, but I can't accept them. I didn't even try. But...it's hard. It's really goddamn hard!" he raged all of a sudden. I lay a hand on his shoulder, softly massaging his tense shoulder.

"But that's not all. They didn't tell me anything. I was kept in the dark for nearly three years. This year, I found out that Tamara was infertile. Tasia and Alexis were adopted a long time ago, but no one bothered to tell me. I wouldn't have done anything about it, but knowing would've made me feel like I was family. And it wasn't a big deal; it was just the last straw. And I also know that it's not my secret to tell, but FUCK ME! I'm far too angry to give." he said, bouncing through emotions faster than I can pee.

"Give what?"

"A shit. Obviously."

"Okay. So then what? It still doesn't make sense." I pushed, sniffing nosily.

"Well, I'd start to become comfortable with them. Trust them, even. And then BAM! I've been a joke the whole time. I was mad. I said some hurtful things. To everyone. I don't regret them, but I'm not exactly happy I said them. And then I was off to boarding school within four days. When I got back, no one mentioned my outburst. We all just acted like nothing ever happened. Like I didn't...like I didn't call Tasia and Alexis bastards. Like I didn't tell Tamara that she was a whore, or that she deserved to rot in hell, or that she didn't deserve to live if she couldn't give someone else life. Like I didn't shove Tatum in to a glass table. or  yell at him that he was NOT my father, he was just a guy that fucked my mother, or scream in his face that he drove my mother to death with his Bare. Fucking. Hands!" he bellowed, scrunching his eyes closed and clenching his teeth. After a moment or two, he calmed down.

"As I said, we all ignored our issues. We stayed silent. But we were tense. All of us. Constantly waiting for me to explode. And I did, but no one acknowledged it. It made me angrier! I didn't know what to do. I still don't. I just...I let loose. It got worse, and it got better. But whenever you were around, it was easier to act like we were happy. Like I was happy. But I guess that act flew out the window." he said, laughing darkly. 

"Hey, it's okay. You're still my friend. I actually feel better you aren't average. I was feeling a little resentful and jealous." I joked, half-serious.

"That's cute." he said, taking my hand in his and placing them on his lap. I embarrassingly felt my cheeks heat up a little.

"What else? Tell me more." I pressed, abruptly hungry for info. 

"Well you're forward. But no matter how endearing you look right now, I am NOT going in to details." he firmly replied, laughing at my pouty face.

Hello, mood swings! Kevin is worse than a girl who just got her very first period...! 

"Aw, man. You're mean." I frowned, batting my eyelashes in an attempt to look cute. 

"Oh, yeah. Well you aren't the only one who wants to be enlightened. I want to know exactly how you ended up making out with Jason, and later running away from him." he retorted, smiling devilishly. 

My eyes involuntarily widened, and I managed to choke on my spit. After uselessly (and painfully) thumping me on the back, he smirked at my reaction.

"Ah...never mind. Hehe, let's go back." I laughed awkwardly. He shook his head bemusedly, probably because of my childish antics, and silently stood up, holding out a hand. 

I eyed it suspiciously, but gratefully took it. And we walked together, away in to the sunset.

Okay, no. That would be lame. His house is a much better idea.

A/N: Sorry about the late update. Only five hours. Plus, it's a LOT longer, so don't be mad.  It's 1146 words. My chapters are usually around 500 words. Vote and comment. I REALLY want to know what you guys think about the turn it's taken! Love you forever...Actually, no. Only when you vote AND comment AND add it to your reading list. Expecially add it to your reading list. So go do that. All three.

- Mia :*