SHOUT - Adopted by Lin Manuel Miranda

LAUNDRY DAY

That crackling you hear? That's the sound of hell freezing over. Alert the authorities. Commence lockdown. The Parents are bickering.

Vanessa wants Lin to do the laundry but Lin is working on a new song and is on the brink of a so-called "creative breakthrough." Sebastian nuzzles into Tobillo's back on the armchair. I settle into the couch pillows. The 3-D glasses go on. The popcorn kernels go popopop.

Lin hangs onto the molding of the doorway to his office. His headphones are on. "I have to finish one thing. It'll be two milliseconds."

Vanessa stirs dinner in a pot and yells from the kitchen. "Well, Mr. Lazy forgot to wash the clothes yesterday. And the day before."

Lin whines. "Because I was on a roll!"

"Your roll will still be here when you get back, babe." 

Lin puffs out his cheeks and hooks his Beats around his neck. Vanessa leans into the counter when he slides past to get the laundry bin from the kitchen table. He kisses her cheek on the way out.

"Viddie." He snaps and points to the door with his thumb. "C'mon. You're my assistant."

I shoot up from the couch. "What the hell? I'm not your fricking maid."

"You're not gonna sit on your butt and sulk all day. Vamonos."

No way am I lacing up my boots for this crap. I wear Lin's old sneakers. They flap on my feet each time I take a step. Halfway through the elevator ride, Lin shoves the laundry bin in my hands. "Make yourself useful."

"Make yourself shut the hell up."

I wince at how lame a line that is. Lin snorts and re-presses the button for the basement. I guffaw when we exit the elavator. This doesn't look like basement. Or smell like one. Lin's old sneakers leave vague outlines in the blonde rug. Even the laundry room is swanky, with abstract still-lifes hung in a row above the washing machines.

"If you and Vanessa keep this up, least you got a place to crash." I sniff the air. "It's cozy enough."

He sorts white and dark clothes into separate piles. "Oh, every couple argues." He bends down. His face is inches from mine. "It makes the relationship stronger."

Son of a bitch. He knows I lied about Jeremy driving me home. I should have come up with a better excuse, one that didn't involve relationships, which are so obviously against my morals. That bullshit only works if you're a nice person.

I yank a shirt from Lin's hand and chuck it into the washer. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"The only thing better than a good lie, Vidya—" He tucks a strand of hair behind his ear and stands with his hand on his hip, like the girls at school. "—is a really bad one."

I grab another shirt from him and throw it into the washer so hard that it slams against the back wall of the machine. THWACK. "Go to hell."

He twists open the laundry detergent. "After you, miss."

"You'll have been down there a long time before I show up, grandpa."

"So that's how it is." He shakes out a pair of jeans. "Just wait, Viddie. They're all waiting for you down there. The devil will shake your hand at the door."

I slam the washer shut and press start. The clothes whirl around and blend into a laundry smoothie. "They'll hang a banner that says, 'welcome home, Lin.' "

Lin hops up to sit on the drier. "They'll have a table of gifts for you."

I stare straight into his face. "They'll bake a cake with your name in red icing."

He bends over and snorts. He has a weird laugh. I can't tell if he's appreciating my joke or suffering a seizure. "Oh, Viddie." He sits up straight and shakes his head, still laughing. "Viddie, Viddie, Viddie."

I hop up on the washer beside him and feel the whirr of the clothes beneath me. "Who's this Viddie girl? I don't think we've met."

"No one's ever called you that?"

I'm not the type of girl people give nicknames to. I pause with my feet suspended half-swung over the laundry basket. Is this the part where I laugh? Is this where I realize this is the family I have been waiting for, then finish the laundry and give Lin a big gooey hug and skip upstairs hand in hand and snuggle into the couch with Vanessa and Sebastian to watch Disney movies? 

No. This is the part where I thrust open the washer door so hard that it slams against the machine and boomerangs shut. This is the part where I transfer the clothes to the drier and tell Lin that no, no one has ever called me Viddie because it sounds like something a hooker would name herself. 

"Really? I like it." Lin watches me toss Sebastian's footie pajamas into the drier. He catches my eye and grins. "It fits."