Metanoia (n): Ancient Greek Word Meaning: the journey of changing one's mind, heart, self, or way of life Pronunciation: meh-tah-noy-ah
What could go wrong? What could go wrong when Monsta X are preparing for the next comeback in order to fascinate...
A lot of time passed since he brought me here....I guess. I can't think of a day that passed without me crying or him torturing me. He is completely mad, he keeps forcing drugs inside my body, when he does that my body feels stronger and strangely relieved. When that feeling stops I start panicking and hurting and everything gets louder and faster, my whole body trembles and it won't stop until he injects more. I don't even know how I ended up pleading him. I feel so cheap and dirty, he calls me names that I never that someone would say to me and he keeps threatening my life if I don't do what he wants me to do.
I was sitting on the floor tied up, my eyes were tied with a cloth and my mouth was gagged as well. My eyes hurt since last night and I am sure that if I could look at them they would be red and puffy.
My vocal cords were in big pain, last night I couldn't stay quiet even though he kept yelling me to do so. The pain was just to much for me and screams came out naturally.
I haven't slept for days, I can't. Every time I close my eyes I see him....or sometimes I see the members and I feel safe but am afraid that if I fall asleep they will leave me. My body is tired and I feel like my temperature is high, I feel my bones aching. I have been puking a lot lately usually after...the torturing, I feel so disgusting and dirty. I don't eat the food he gives me either cause I am scared that he might have poisoned it, that's probably the reason I have constant stomach aches.
The room was cold inside all the time and Junhyeong had brought me a blanket. I didn't want it though, I don't anything that belongs to him.
Junhyeong's daily routine is to come greet me in the morning and leave for work and when he comes home and feeds my and then.....we play....
He suddenly came into the room "Good morning baby I have no time for games cause I am late" I heard him coming closer to me. He suddenly pulled my gag.
"Good morning" my voice cracked and I was about to cry, I have to be polite to him...if I don't...he..he...
He pulled me into his hug and kissed me. My soul was screaming for help but my body didn't react except from trembling a little. I had accepted that if I don't do what he wants me to I will be punished. "What a good boy, I hope you understand that what I did last night was because you misbehaved" he said while caressing a scar on my cheek and I left a sob remembering last night.
He got up to leave, I could hear him stepping away "Wait" I shouted and my neck ached, the footsteps stopped so he must have listened "I feel weak....I want" I looked down and tears started falling on the cloth that was on covering my eyes "please help me" I hated this.
He came closer and placed his hand through my hair. "Oh baby, you can't take your dose until tonight you know the rules, right?" I nodded slowly and kept crying silently. "Oh I almost forgot" he said and forced the clothe into my mouth that I absolutely hated but still didn't react. "Okay baby, I need to leave" he said and headed out of the room.
I laid on the floor and pulled my legs closer to my body. I was finally alone, no one to hit me or yell at me, it was me and myself. I started sobbing loudly, not even the cloth could muffle my desperate sobs, maybe God would listen and save me.
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