Numb

chapter 5

"Victor? Are you okay?" Phichit put his hand on my shoulder. It's been three months since the incident. The police took all the evidence they could find and interviewed everyone from the wedding but they told me that it was unlikely they would find the killer. They told me it looked professional. I have been home for only a week.

Already it was too much. Everything reminded me of Yuri. To think that I was mad at him for not showing up to the wedding! I should have checked on him sooner. Maybe I could have saved him, if I had just checked on him sooner! The guilt was plaguing me. I just... I can't... I want to stop thinking about it.

Images of my Yuri lying on the ground dead flash through my head over and over again. How am I suppose to live with this? I have to find who did this to Yuri! And when I do-

"Victor?" A hand tapped me on the shoulder, "Victor, your spacing out. Are you okay?"

I turn and see Phichit staring at me. "Uhh... Yea I'm fine. It's just hard you know?"

"I know how you feel Victor but you can't just wallow ya know?" He gave me a sympathizing look and put a hand on my shoulder.

I looked at him, "It has been a couple weeks! What am I supposed to do? He was the love of my life, Phicht, and he was your best friend. I don't understand,  you want me to move on already?" Tears threatened to fall as I glared at him. How could he even suggest moving on from Yuri already? I was about to spend the rest of my life with him and now I will not be able to.

Phichit just looked at me, "Calm down, Victor. All I am saying is that Yuri wouldn't want this for you. He definitely would want you to just move on and find happiness. I'm not saying you have to do that right away but he wouldn't want you to linger on his death. Trust me on this."

I couldnt even look at him anymore. As I stared at the ground I muttered, "Get out." The pain of losing Yuri was still all too real. My heart ached as I thought of him.

With a heavy sigh, Phichit walked out. As soon as I heard the door close, I broke down. How could Phichit be so insensitive to me? I know him and Yuri were close but to tell me that Yuri would want me to just forget about him that is outrageous. I know Yuri; he would not want me to mourn his death but he would not want me to just forget about him either.

What is up with Phichit lately? He has been all over the place it seems. I need to talk to Yurio. I grabbed my coat and went out the door.

I arrived at Yurio's place about ten minutes later. I didn't even bother knocking, I just walked right in. I wasn't overly happy with want I found. There in the middle of the room was Otabaek and Yurio making out.

"What the hell is going on!" I shouted. Tears poured out my eyes. I couldn't handle others even remotely being happy. Why were they not mourning Yuri? Am I the only one that cares? They jumped apart and looked at me. Yurio's face turned a bright shade of red, I could practically feel his face burning.

Otabaek spoke first, "We were kissing." He spoke with his usual cool aditude which did not make me feel better.

"What are you doing here, Vitya? Aren't you supposed to be at Yuri's?"

I was supposed to be there but I can't handle that place anymore. Everything reminds me of him. I locked eyes with Yurio, "I came to get away... it's just... I..." my voice broke, "I c-c-can't be be there r-right now!" Losing all the composer that I had, I flopped down on the floor. I didn't even bother to walk all the way into the house.

"VICTOR!" I snapped my head up to Yurio, "YOU'RE SO PATh-"

Otabaek clapped his hand over his mouth. "Don't say anything." I looked at them both through my watery eyes. Why is everyone making me feel worse?

Yurio took a deep breath and removed Otabaek's hand, "Yuri wouldn't want you to be this upset. You have to try and get over him Vitya... I know it is hard bu-"

"Hard!?," I couldnt hold in my rage anymore, "It's impossible! Why does everyone say to get over him!? I just want a person to grieve with me and understand. They said that someone killed Yuri! Why are we not investigating?" My throat burned as I yelled at them. "Why does no one care!"

"We do care," It was Otabaek that spoke this time, "It's just we want what's best for you and we feel like you shouldn't be so obsessed with this." Although he said it with a gentle tone, I still wanted to make make him take back his words.

I didn't responded instead I just got up off the ground and walked back out the door. I could hear them both calling my name. I knew that I had to find Yuri's killer even if it meant the death of me. I just needed a little help.

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Who could possibly be able to give Victor any help?? Find out next chapter! Hope you are enjoying the story so far! As always do not forget to vote and comment. 😄