Guardian

chapter fifteen

Spending time with Kellin over the next few weeks was great. He really opened up to me, in ways that no one else ever had before. I knew all about how his mother had left when he was just a little kid, how his dad had become a drunken alcoholic because of the loss, and how he had started taking out all his anger on Kellin. I was shocked (to say the very least) when Kellin admitted that he didn't hate his father for all the things he'd done to him over the years. How could he say that? He was literally his dad's own personal punching bag. No one deserved to be treated like that. I wanted to punch his face in for leaving all those marks on Kellin.

The marks Kellin bore ran deeper than just physical damage though. It was easy to see that he was depressed. If the look in his eyes when he was alone didn't say it, then the scars decorating his body definitely did. However, ever since he had started opening up to me, I could see a big change in him, and it was definitely a good one. The blades he kept hidden from everyone else hadn't been taken out of their hiding spot in weeks. I was happy that he was making progress, but I was also confused as hell.

I thought that showing someone that I really, truly cared was my key to getting out of here. Even after holding Kellin's hand and rubbing his back into the early hours of the morning, I didn't feel any closer to being able to leave. What more could I possibly have to do to make up for all the things I'd done wrong? I hadn't been that bad of a person- had I?

I got a distraction from my thoughts when I appeared in Mike's room. I'd been visiting him regularly to make sure he was doing alright and to keep him from getting into too much trouble. Even though I was dead I was still incredibly over-protective of my little bro.

I had the strangest sense that something was wrong from the second that I stepped foot in the house. The biggest tip off was that it was noon, and not only was Mike not asleep in his bed, but it was perfectly made. I scanned the room quickly but nothing else seemed out of place. As soon as I stepped out of Mike's room and into the hall I could hear the sound of my mother's muffled crying. Something was really wrong here. The question was, what could it be?

"Vivian, come on," I heard my father say before I could find my mother. He sounded so... gruff and angry. It was a surprise to me. When I had been alive he was always so nice and happy. Was this a result of my death? I knew most couples didn't stay together after losing a child but- "We have to get to the hospital." My thoughts were interrupted by my dad speaking again.

Hospital? Oh god, what had happened? Was Mikey okay? I watched as my mother followed my dad out the front door, paralyzed with fear. If he was in the hospital he was at least alive... right? I felt panic starting to consume me as my mind ran through all the worst-case scenarios.

No, Vic, get a hold of yourself. You have to go find out what happened to Mike, I thought sternly to myself.

One second I was standing in the middle of my house, eyes wide and mouth half open, and the next I was at the hospital, watching my parents walk down the hall. My dad stopped at one of the white numbered doors and held it open for my mother. I raced down the hall after them and dodged through the door before it shut.

I almost choked when I saw Mike laying on one of the hospital beds. What seemed like a million different machines and tubes were connected up to his pale, fragile body.

"... bad car crash," one of the nurses was explaining to my parents. "He's in a coma right now. He's lucky to be alive. We're not sure if he's going to wake up, to be perfectly honest. We'll just have to wait and see. I can assure you that he's getting the best possible care."

My mother had her face buried in my dad's chest and from the way her shoulders were heaving, I knew she was sobbing. Slowly, I walked over to Mike's bedside and knelt beside him.

"Oh Mikey," I whispered, placing my hand over his. "You cannot die on me. Think of mom and dad. They already lost me (which was a terrible mistake, by the way) and they can't afford to lose you too. Also, purgatory sucks, wouldn't recommend it. Please, just wake up."

No matter how much I begged and pleaded, he didn't wake up. For days all I did was sit and watch him, praying to god, or whatever higher power there might be, that he would just open his eyes, even for a second. No such luck. I was half delirious with worry- all the days started to blend together until I had no idea how long I'd been there for.

"Please, please, please Mike," I was muttering as I paced back and forth across the room. "You can do this. You're too young to die. You have so much potential. You don't want to waste that, trust me."

I was just about to turn around and pace the room once again, when I could've sworn I saw Mike twitch out of the corner of my eye. I spun around to face him, but if he had moved before, he was still as a statue now.

"Mike? Did you just...?"

Almost as soon as I'd spoken, two of his fingers moved slightly. By the time I'd made it over to his bedside, Mikey's eyes were fluttering open.

"Mike, Mike, oh my god, you're okay," I said, tears of joy springing to my eyes. Suddenly, the machines around him started beeping and wailing loudly, alerting the nurses that Mike was conscious again. I didn't have much time to say 'welcome back' (not that he knew I was there anyways) before he was being were surrounding him, ushering him off to another room for tests to be done.

For a while I just stood there in a state of pure euphoria. My baby brother was okay! I stayed there until a thought, well, person, crossed my mind. Kellin. I hadn't talked to him in at least a week. He was probably worrying himself sick. Hopefully nothing worse than that.

I appeared in Austin's house with the intention of checking up on Kels, but I didn't even need to look in the rooms to know that no one was home. I checked his room regardless, just to make sure. As I had suspected, no one was home. I frowned a bit- it wasn't school hours right now so where could he be? I checked the school anyways, and then the lake, followed by the liquor store and every other place I could think of to search. Kellin was nowhere to be found. There was only one last place that I could think of that he might be at, but I couldn't think of a logical reason why he'd be there.

There were no cars in the driveway at Kellin's dad's house, so at least I didn't have to worry about being tempted to punch his dad in the face while I was here. After floating through the front door, I could hear the sound of a closet door opening upstairs.

Please let this be Kellin, I begged silently. I was beginning to worry about him. As slowly and quietly as I could, I opened the door to his old bedroom.

"Oh god no," I said in complete disbelief. There Kellin was, pointing a shotgun at his head. "NO!" I ran at him, knocking the gun to the side just as he pulled the trigger.

I moaned in agony as pain spread through stomach. Oh my god, was it even possible to get shot when you were a ghost? The throbbing throughout my entire body said yes. I didn't have time to figure out what exactly happens if you get shot while you're dead, because I could feel myself beginning to fade away. This was it, wasn't it? I was leaving purgatory. That's what I needed to do the whole time- stop someone from making the same mistake as me.

"Kellin," I choked out. "I love you."

Just as I was leaving earth for good, I saw a look on Kellin's face that let me know he had heard.