wilderness | paul lahote

{27}

a/n: just realised i'm number 17 in the paul lahote tag out of like 600 stories... what??? I've already said this but i appreciate y'all for enjoying, even if it's a lil shitty at parts because of my damn writers block that keeps bugging me more often than I'd like. thank youuuu!! Over and out.

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Paul's POV

I looked at her as she slept, cuddling her pillow, with the blanket half off her body. She was so peaceful. So beautiful in the dim light of the moon that emitted from the window.

I sat on the chair in the corner of the room. Unable to sleep. Never in my life did I think I'd imprint on someone. Me out of everyone in the pack. I'd thought I'd either be the last, or it wouldn't happen. But it did.

I'd always been the bad boy. The player. The one with the ladies. That was what others thought of me. But that was far from the truth. That was just a facade I had put on. To keep people from coming in and knowing the real Paul Lahote.

The truth was that after my parents divorced. After the move to La Push. After what I saw my dad go through - I had pushed love to be the last thing I ever wanted. The last thing I ever needed. The last thing I believed in. It didn't exist for me.

And Ariah was the same. It pained me to know how much she'd gone through. How she had not felt true happiness for most of her life. It was both funny and tragic how someone so small could be such a magnet for damage and destruction.

In a way I felt honoured to have her as my imprintee. She gave my life new purpose, meaning. I was her protector now. I was her happiness. Even if she didn't know or quite realise that yet. I would risk anything and everything just to make her happy. Even if it meant running to the other side of the world, or killing someone. I'd do it, for her.

We both crashed, like the waves and the shore. Perhaps it was because we were too similar, or maybe we just were too different. I saw parts in her that I wish I had - like the ability to calm myself, self-control. The ability to care about life and nature as much as she did. And at the same time, I saw bits of me in her - the restlessness, the pain inside, the overflow of emotions.

She had already changed me. I hadn't told her how, when I had disappeared the last time, I tried my best not to shift. This was my way of practicing self control. To be safe around her. But to also one day be able to grow old with her. It had been physically painful to be away from her, and I vowed to myself I'd always be there for her, by her side. From here on out. She might get tired of me. She might start to hate me. But at least I could say I'd done everything for her.

Ariah's POV

I woke to the lack of warmth in my bed. Paul had stayed the night again, without me asking this time. He had used the excuse of his bed being too lonely, which I had thought to be cheesy but cute.

I was cold, and to my surprise anxious that he wasn't here. Or at least I didn't feel him here. I sat up and rubbed my eyes before letting them focus in the dim room. A figure sat in the corner, on the chair. I knew it was Paul.

"Why aren't you sleeping?" I whispered, making him shift his attention to me. I could faintly see him smile as he stood up and walked over to my side of the bed. He sat down, I could see his handsome face better now.

"I couldn't sleep."

"Too much on your mind?"

He nodded.

"Happens to me too. Do you want to talk about it?"

He shook his head now. "It's nothing. Why are you up?"

I blushed, thankful it was dark enough so he didn't see. "I was cold."

He chuckled quietly. "I really am your own personal radiator."

I smiled. "You really are. I don't know how I managed before you."

He looked at me, his face turning back serious now. But it wasn't the bad kind of serious. Not the angry, or the sad. His eyes still held a passionate spark.

He inched closer to me, and cupped my cheek with his palm. Unwillingly, I held my breath again as my stomach turned more and more with every inch he moved.

He stopped, his eyes were now so close to mine. His lips almost touchable with mine. I felt his breath.

"Just kiss me." I breathed. And so he did. Our lips intertwined. The kiss - slow and sweet. The same electricity running through my body, down my spine, from the top of my head down to my toes.

After some time he pulled away again. I would be lying if I said I wasn't sad. I was. If I could spend my entire life kissing Paul, I would. The feeling was just something different. Magical almost. Something I could never be able to describe.

His breath was shaky as he stood up from the bed and walked over to the other side. I lay back down, pulling the covers over me. I felt the bed tip as he climbed next to me, pulling me into his arms.

"Are you warmer now?"

I nodded as I snuggled closer to him.

"I know about your other wolf thing." I said. I didn't want to throw Emily under the bus like that, but at the same time I didn't want to keep it from Paul that I knew.

"What?"

"The mind reading thing." When I didn't feel his breathing change, I knew he was okay with me knowing. "How does it work?"

He was silent for a few seconds before answering. "Our minds are just kind of telepathically linked. We can send each other signals and speak to each other that way when we're in wolf form. It's cool, but it also sucks."

"Why?"

"Well there's almost no privacy between the members of the pack. We can see every memory and every thought in each others heads. I mean, yeah, you can try to zone them out, but still."

I thought about it. The pack must know everything then. From our fights to our talks. They must know about our kiss as well. I was amazed how none of them had brought that up, knowing how they loved to tease.

"Don't worry," he chuckled. "I try to keep my mind clean and reserved."

I giggled a little, hoping he would. But knowing he probably couldn't.

I yawned and closed my eyes as I turned my back towards him, making him turn to his side and snaking his arm around my waist.

"Sweet dreams, little one."