The Smell Of Spray Paint

Eleven.

The next thing I knew was a pounding headache and nausea.

What just happened? Did it pass out? I must have... Judas... I remembered him insisting on coffee and then...

Oh no.

It finally all came together and I jerked away, gasping as I looked up. I was in the same room as I slept in; I was still in his apartment... He did this! H-He must have drugged my coffee! What was gonna happen to me now? I should have never trusted him.

I tried to raise my hands to rub at my eyes but when I jerked at them they didn't move. I was tied down to my chair, both arms and legs refused to budge, the strong rope digging into my skin and binding me to my seat.

I opened my mouth to scream for help but my mouth was dry, no sound came out. My face was burning and suddenly I was breathing sharply and gagging. I was going to die here.

I wanted to grab at my face and hair, move about in some way but I couldn't, I was going to die and I couldn't even move! I leaned forward, putting my head between my knees. Rope pressed at my stomach.

"Help me..." I whimpered into the empty room, "Please... Please..."

I screwed my eyes shut before sitting up again.

I took a deep breath.

And another.

I should have never trusted Judas, let him take me here, stayed the night. I shouldn't have even spoken to him. It was so stupid of me... So stupid, stupid, stupid!

I made frustrated noise.

This was it! This was... The end.

I started to sob. My nose was running even though I was sniffling, I looked pathetic, I felt pathetic and this wasn't how I wanted to go!

I hunched over as much as I could in the chair I was tied to, I wouldn't be able to see my mom again... Or my dad...

Or Gilbert.

I looked up; I couldn't wipe tears away so I tilted my head to keep my tears in.

I wish I told him I loved him. If I have one regret, it was that. He hated me when I left him yesterday and I could never see him again!

"I love you, Gil'." I said, pretending he could hear me, "I'm so sorry for what I did, I'll never forgive myself! But somehow... I've fallen in love with you! Dammit, I really have!"

"That's touching." There was another voice in the room. Judas'.

I whipped my head around, seeing him standing against the door. He must have come in when I was talking to Gilbert.

I fixed my darkest daggers on him, despite the fear in my stomach making feel like I was seriously gonna puke.

"What are you doing to me?" I tried to keep voice even.

He didn't answer, just looked at me.

"Well!?" My voice was crumbling, wobbling and betraying me.

He advanced over to, me slowly and crouched in front of me. He put on hand on each of my knees. I pressed my lips together and didn't look at him. I his hands were like huge weights and I could do nothing to get them off. I was so powerless.

"Matthew." He said. It was the one of the first times he had said my name. My name on his lips made me shudder. He knew who I was and hadn't said a thing.

"Let me go!" I struggled against the ropes again, though I knew I wasn't gonna be getting out of here.

"Ah, ah, ah, please refrain from causing such a ruckus." He gave me a smile that spread across his face, making me squirm like it was some kind of infectious disease.