Moments Before

Ashton Chapter 21

As usual let me know what you guys think. I'm planning on posting another chapter if I get to it today. Enjoy!!!

Chapter 21

I've been home for three days and have had visitors for every single one of those days. The boys skipped school to linger in my bedroom and act as servants for anything I need. It's been ... nice? I mean, I'm on pain pills so strong I barely feel anything and for once I get to relax. No one is demanding anything from me. No homework, no chores, no having to keep up pretenses or evade people at school. Lately I've used the time for Derrick. We're... working on it. There's so much to catch up on and let go off but we've been spending whole days together. 

The few times that the boys had to leave, or in the evenings when they went home Derrick sits on my bed. We chat, or he draws while I read. We listen to each other's music. he listens to electronica garbage and he says that musical songs are stupid. We reminisce, laugh and watch stupid television shows. Ramon has kept his distance so far. He said he wished I had stayed dead, and I almost died. I don't think him and Derrick are on the best of terms right now either and for that I feel guilty. 

Derrick is going to die, and I can't stand the thought of those two not talking before hand being my fault. But every time I think of a way to fix it, it would mean me talking to Ramon. And I can't do that yet, so instead I live with that sickening feeling rooted in my stomach. Like larva and worms have settled there squirming, slithering and crawling around. 

As it would turn out most of my injuries aren't that serious. I have a really bad concussion, bruises and various cuts and had mild internal bleeding. They said I should be back to normal in a week which is surprising. 

As for Noah I haven't called yet. It was weird that he left and I'm tired of him randomly taking off. I miss him though, and Rico. Our frank communication and easy friendship. Though we only got to know each other for one night. Maybe I'll call tomorrow but not right now. Today is the day that I'm going to talk to Ramon. Honestly I feel ill just thinking about it but I'll have to learn to get over it. 

I knock hesitantly on his door during a brief moment where I was alone. 

"What do you want?" He yells through the door sounding like a stereotypical surly teenager. 

"To talk." I answer quietly because my throat still hurts like hell. Especially today, first day off of the pain meds. I hear him curse behind the door. It swings open and his face is shocked and nervous. I think he's expecting a reprimand and I want to yell at him. But there's something cowering in his eyes, he needs us to be okay, maybe even more than he needs Derrick and him to be okay. He gestures for me to enter. 

I haven't been in here since he moved back in so I stop in the middle of the room to take in the area. Maroon walls with vintage guitars on the walls. The whole place smells like a record store and it's apparent what a music dweeb he is. 

A record player, baby grande piano, recording table, variety of guitars and cello label him so. He has a few of my favorite photos on the wall. You would never guess that a minor league criminal decorated the place because it oozes class and sophistication. I stop and stare at one of my framed photos, it's at the river. One of those perfectly timed ones, Derrick and Ramon splashing around, the sun creating the ideal photo conditions. It's candid, my favorite kind of photo. 

Ramon carpeted his floor with a lush dark grey color and it feels nice on my bare feet, the carpet threads sticking up in between my toes. He has a humidifier in the corner and a dehumidifier by all of the instruments.  It keeps the air in the room easier to breath but the dehumidifier protects the expensive instruments. He gestures nervously towards the piano bench and I sit. He sits on the bed and we stare at each other.