Barbed Wire Tattoo - Jungkook gang au

24 - Stargazing

TRIGGER WARNING

CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR

<Jungkook>

My bed wasn't as comfortable without her in it. My blankets no longer smelled like her and that just made it hurt worse. She was gone, she was really gone this time and I'd never get her back. I don't blame her, we all got scared of the truth and lied. We didn't want to admit to our mistake, we felt guilty. We promised to protect her and we didn't. What hurts more is that she's a member, she is apart of Amphis and we let our team mate down.

Taehyung didn't come to sleep with me at night anymore, he told Jin he's scared of me after we fought. I hope he's okay, when he doesn't talk about his feelings they eat him up and he gets sick. He stops taking his medicine, stops eating, I'm worried about him. But I guess I don't really have a place to talk. I haven't eaten a proper meal since she left, and that was nearly 2 weeks ago. I haven't really left my room, except to shower.

I pushed myself out of bed and shuffled to the bathroom. When I saw my reflection I was shocked, I didn't look like myself anymore. My black hair was a little too long and it was messy, sticking up in every direction. My face was void of pigment and the bags under my eyes made me look like I was dead. I lifted the loose tee-shirt off my body and was disappointed. I had lost the definition of my abs, my stomach was flat and my ribs were more visible than I liked.

The thin red lines running up my sides made me hate myself a little more. I hadn't done that since I was 15, but losing her made me feel like I was back in time. Back to when I got kicked out and all I had was a small pocket knife and a blanket.

I didn't have anything to strive for anymore, she hated me. She didn't want to speak to me or look at me. I just needed to feel her under my touch one more time. I just needed to hear her say she doesn't hate me, maybe then I could find the motivation to stay alive.

Heavy footsteps coming toward my door made me rush to put my shirt back on. I walked out of the bathroom to see Namjoon looking around for me. When he saw me he sighed in relief.

"Get dressed quickly."

"I don't want to go out hyung." He looked at me weirdly. Probably because I never call him hyung.

"It's Kris. Someone has her, so get fucking dressed and pull the stick out of your ass." Namjoon said and ran out of the room going to collect the other boys. My heart was pounding as I searched my room for clothes. I tightened the bullet proof vest around my chest before I put on a tee-shirt and my Amphis jacket. I was tying my shoes when a gun was placed beside my foot. I looked up to see Taehyung, this is the first time he's voluntarily been in the same room as me since Kris left. He had an angry face but it softened when I pulled him into a hug.

"Don't ignore me." I pulled away from the hug ruffling his hair making him smile. "I love you hyung. Please don't shut us out. I'm sorry."

"It's okay Kookie. I'm all better now, we are getting Baby. I'll be okay now." Tae smiled as he left the room. I tucked the gun into my waistband with a frown. I was happy Taehyung wasn't upset anymore but I wasn't sure how long that was going to last. What we did to Kris was detrimental to our relationship, I'm not sure she'll come back even if we save her this time.

I walked down to the car seeing all the boys piling into one and Namjoon on his motorcycle. Jisoo was coming with us this time, she said it'd be good to have another female for Kris. I didn't mind as long as Kris is safe and comfortable anyone could fucking come. Namjoon left first and we were told to wait 10 minutes before following him. While I sat in the passenger seat my legs bounced up and down anxiously. I kept checking the time over and over again waiting till the clock hit 4:40, that's when we leave. It seemed like the clock was stuck at 4:39, it was the longest minute of my life. My hands were shaking as Jisoo sped out of the driveway, she took every turn sharp and we were sliding back and forth in our chairs. When we saw the warehouse we parked away from it so we could be quieter when getting in.