The Revenant

Pauline

PAULINE

I went home that night after training with the others.

Gods I was exhausted. I was drained from all that slashing and doing the thingie with that gods damned flail.

Sheesh. Being in the army was tough.

As I got to my room,I tore off my armor,ran the bath and waited patiently for it to fill.

Took about three minutes before the bath was ready to go,with steam rising steadily from the warm water.

I slid my towel off and stepped into the bath tub,sitting down slowly,being sure to keep my arms outside the tub so I could relax comfortably.

A deep sigh escaped my lips.

"Fuck me...what a day."

Fight broke out between Elena and Amaani,poor girl had her nose dislocated and a few teeth knocked loose. I wondered if she was okay. She left for some time after Elena had gone. A good hour and a half passed before Amaani returned from...wherever the hell she went to.

I felt some of my muscles click,relaxing beneath the warm water. For a few moments I felt as though I was just...nowhere. I felt lost,but in a good way. I didn't feel like I was in an out of body experience but I did at the same time. I didn't feel like I was floating...but I did at the same time.

I'm tellin ya,Warm Water can do some weird shit to you man.

Gods above I was comfortable in that water. My peace was short lived. It wasn't long after until a loud knock found itself pounding against my ear drums. As I turned to look,I saw Nova standing in the door way. He looked down,not looking at me, but that didn't change anything.

I almost lept right out of my skin when I saw him. Even though I knew Nova wasn't the perverted kind,just barging in without any context or a knock or a fuckin...something,was fucking weird. The scariest part was that I didn't even hear the bastard enter my room at all.

"Nova what the fuck are you doing here?!" I demanded,covering up as best I could.

"I just came to check up on you." He said.

"I'm fine."

Nova's eye's fell on me and as soon as they did,my cheeks went blood red. I was fucking naked and this...dark...handsome...fucker was just looking at me with those gorgeous hazel eye's and that...lovely flowing short black hair...Gods above Nova was hot.

What the fuck am I saying?!

He approached me fast,grabbed my right hand  wrist and pulled it forward,exposing my breast to him. The crimson on my cheeks darkened,but it wasn't because of my exposed breast.

"Again? We talked about this Paulie." Nova said,his voice brimming with anger as he gripped my bandaged wrist in his hand.

"You're hurting me Nova."

Nova let go of my arm,letting my hand fall into the water before I yanked it out as soon as the pain shot up my arm.

"Pauline...you need to stop. Cutting doesn't make things any better."

"It's easier said than done! Fuck sake Nova I'm trying okay?! Do you know how hard it is to-"

"Stop yelling at me Pauline."

"I...I'm sorry."

Nova climbed into the bathtub,clothes and all, and sat beside me.

"It's just so...fucking hard. To stay positive. To see everyone else have fun and smile,to be the one who makes everyone smile but at the end of the day there's no one who makes me smile...it isn't fair."

I suddenly felt cold. Deathly cold. Like I had been shoved into a freezer despite the steaming warm water I sat in. Nova pulled me into a hug,his arms wrapped tightly round me.

-is Nova...hugging me?-

I'd never seen Nova hug anyone before. Not even Elena. His embrace was strangely cold,but it felt so safe. I didn't think of Nova as a friend in that moment,nor did I think of him as a lover. I felt more like I was being hugged by a sibling. Like a younger brother was holding onto me.

"Paulie. This world isn't a fair place. You have to learn to accept that. Men and women can be born into poverty and have so much potential but still fall short. Look at Eskarina's family as an example. But a man can also be born with no talents at all and have no more than a platinum spoon shoved up his ass and he'll still have the world bowing beneath his feet. Life isn't fair."

"You aren't making me feel any better."

"Never said I was going to try. Can't feel better by yourself,you need someone else. That loneliness in your chest won't go away. Only love can mend a broken heart. That's just the way it is for people like us."

Nova took a breath then spoke again. "How are things going with Sven."

"They're...going okay. Slow...but okay. It's hard to deal with him sometimes."

"He still trying to get that other city girl's affection?"

I giggled softly. "Yeah. Always trying to see her. She told me she's interested in him,but she's just playing hard to get."

"Women..."

"Your wounds...have they healed?"

"Barely. I power through it nonetheless. No point in bitching about it. It's just a few stab wounds. Nothing I haven't taken before."

"Alright mister macho man. By the Gods no need to get all defensive. I was just asking a question."

"Yet now you're the one whose being defensive."

"I...have no retort for that."

I gave Nova a friendly punch which led to him cringing in pain. I instantly apologised while he glared at me.

Nova sat back,clutching his arm,gently rubbing it.

"I'm s-"

"It's okay. It's fine Paulie."

I couldn't help but stare at Nova. It was strange. He was strange. I was naked,but he wasn't even looking,or even peeking. He wasn't flustered at all,or shy,he just sat there staring at the wall. He wasn't even hard after hugging me...

Nova was so composed. I wondered how he did it. How he was so strong both physically and emotionally.  Then again,I guess all of us had different questions about Nova,Elena wanted why he never loved her,Eskarina wanted to know about his past,Amaani why he was always pissed off,none of us truly knew anything about him.

He stood up and climbed out of the tub,his coat and lower half of his body soaked in water.

"Stay strong Paulie. You aren't weak. Even if you may think you are."

Nova turned and walked out, leaving me alone in the tub.

It wasn't long after the silence set in when my mind raced with questions about the conversation I had just had with Nova.

Throughout our entire conversation,there was one sentance he said that stuck. One that was slowly clawing its way to the surface that I couldn't stop thinking about.

When he was talking about how only love can mend a broken heart...What did Nova mean when he said people like us?