A/N This one can be considered triggering so if you get depressed easily I don't suggest reading it.
I walked into the house. It was the Spring Fling. Also a week since it happened. I walked into the bathroom and turned on the water in the shower. I peeled off my clothes from the day and stepped over the edge of the tub and into the steaming water. I let the water run down my body. I ran the razor up my legs, shaving off the annoying hair that grew there. I then washed my hair and body.
I stepped out, wrapping a towel around my body. The mirror was fogged so I wiped it off. I gazed at my reflection. A tear escaped my eyes as I stared. "Why?" I asked myself. To be honest I wish I could go back to the way things were, including the bullies. Everyone treated me so different it pissed me off. I dried off my black hair with blue bangs and brushed it out. I then put foundation on my pale face and framed my dark brown eyes with eyeliner.
-Flashback-
"Those are my favorite things about you," he said gawking at my eyes. I smiled as he leaned in to kiss me.
-Present Day-
I put light pink lipgloss on my lips and could almost feel his lips on mine. I opened the bathroom door and walked to my room. The house was frigid. I closed my door shaking from the cold and went into the closet. I pulled out a black strapless bra and a pair of black boy shorts from my wooden dresser. I slipped into them...
-Flashback-
I heard the door open and I spun around. "Sorry," he mumbled going back out. "Your mom said you were in here, but I probably should have knocked." I walked back out and kissed his cheek.
"Yeah, you really should have," I stated. He bent down placing his lips next to my ear.
"You're sexy as hell though," he whispered as I blushed, feeling every breath he blew out on my neck.
-Present Day-
I went back to my closet and pulled out the dress he helped me pick out. It was a light blue dress, but with the black lace covering it, the blue looked much darker. The dress itself went down to my knees.
-Flashback-
"Get up!" he said waking into my room. My mom probably let him in.
"Ugh! Why?" I whined.
"Because...we are going dress shopping," he stated happily.
"But you wouldn't look good in a dress," I said.
"Well no...but you would," he said smiling broadly. I smiled back and crawled out if bed.
"Well when you put it like that..."
-Present Day-
I went to the bottom of my closet and pulled out my black strap heels. I walked over to my vanity and opened my jewelry box pulling out the necklace he had given my on our tenth date. It was silver with a red heart on it. I also put in my black angel wing earrings.
I walked into the bathroom and pulled my hair back, so that all the black was in a ponytail and the blue was infringing of my face. I walked into my room and grabbed my small purse. I walked out to the drive way and got saw Serena and her mom waiting for me. "Sorry I took so long," I said.
"It's okay Robbin," said Serena's mom.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" asked Serena. I nodded as her mom pulled away from the curb. The drive was silent, which I didn't mind.
When we pulled up I front if the school, I couldn't get out of the car fast enough. I stepped out thanking Serena's mom and walked in. I made my way to the gym. Music was blaring and people were dancing. Enjoying their lives. I walked over to the far wall where all the chairs were and sat down.
A few people looked in my direction. I just stared at the ground. It wasn't the same with out him...
-Flashback-
"So are we going to the dance?" he asked.
"Why?" I asked.
"'Cause it would be fun and I already kinda bought our tickets," he said. I smiled up at him.
"Then why not? Plus, you'll be there so it'll be fun," I said happily.
-Present Day-
I stared at the ground until I saw a shadow stretch towards me. I looked up and saw Hannah. She was one of the seniors who helped me when I was a fresh man. Now I was a sophomore and she had graduated, but she still helped with the dances. "Hey," she said. I went back to the staring at the ground. "I heard and I know you're probably tired of hearing it, but I'm sorry for your lost," she mumbled. I could barely hear her, but I understood her.
I felt a tear run down my cheek and I looked up at her. I wanted to tell at her for being that up, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. "Thank you," is all I managed. I walked up to the DJ.
"Hey sweetie," he said. It took me a moment before I recognized that it was his dad.
"Hey can you please play Never Too Late by Three Days Grace?" I asked.
"Sure," he said. I walked back to my room as the song started. I could feel the tears falling. People were staring at me, but I didn't care. I refused to look at them, knowing all I'd see is pity. I walked back to my seat and saw someone sit next to me. I looked over to see him.
"Hello sweetie," he whispered. He reached out to brush away a tear, but his hand went right through my cheek. I reached up to touch it, knowing I'd only feel air.
"I miss you," I whispered.
"I know, I'm so sorry," he replied.
-Flashback-
I sat in class, and watched as a woman walked in. He wasn't here today and I couldn't help but wonder why. "I'm looking for Clara," said the woman. I stood up and walked down the row to her. She walked me to the office and put me in the Guidance Counselors office. I sat in the chair confused.
"Hello Clara," said Ms. Flowers with sorrow in her eyes.
"Am I in trouble?" I asked. She shook her head.
"I'm sorry to say this but, Jayy killed himself last night," she said. I could feel my face grow hot as tears ran down my cheeks.
"What?" I asked.
"I'm sorry," she said...
-Present Day-
That was the first of many sorrys as people found out. Over the last week I became angrier with each sorry, but at this moment I needed this sorry. "I forgive you," I whispered, as I stared into his eyes.
He was slightly transparent, but I didn't care. He leaned over and placed a kiss on my cheek. It felt like cold air brushing against it.
"I love you," I heard him whisper as he disappeared. The song needed and I stood up. I went over to Serena.
"I'm gonna go home," I said. She nodded and I walked out to the front of the school and saw my mom waiting out front.
"You made it longer then I thought you would," she said. I got in and we drove to the house. I walked into the bathroom and locked the door. I went into my bag and pulled out my box cutter. I ran the blade down my arms.
"I love you too," I whispered as it went black.
I then saw him standing there, in a doorway. "Why did you do that?" he asked.
"'Cause I can't imagine a life without you," I whispered as he took my hand.
"I would have waited an eternity for you to join me over you ending your own life," he whispered as we entered the bright light.
