Sinful

Tease

For once I wasn't the one having trouble sleeping. I woke up because I felt too warm, it wasn't normal given we were underground, then I noticed that Michael was turning and murmuring things, so I lit a chandelier to be able to see him better. He looked like he was suffering so I decided to gently shake him to wake him up, but the moment I touched his arm some blurry images came to my mind, I saw Michael hugging his knees to his chest as he rocked back and forth in the corner of a room, I heard many voices repeating over and over again to him that he was a monster. 

I felt so bad for Michael, not knowing if what I saw was a nightmare or if it had actually happened.

"Michael... Michael" I whispered to him as I shaked his arm a little.

"Michael, it's only a dream, don't worry" Now I was caressing his cheek, and he slowly seemed to relax.

"It's just a dream" I repeated to him as I continued caressing his cheek, hoping that maybe he'll be able to sleep again.

"It wasn't just a dream" he told me squeezing his eyes and holding my hand.

"You can tell me about it" I told him now that he had woken up.

He turned in bed, and we were now facing each other.

"I'm scared" he told me, his voice reminding me of a little boy, but this wasn't the first time that he'd remind me of it. Sometimes his jokes, and the way he loved teasing people reminded me of a little child, confused and scared.

"What are you afraid of?" I told him taking his hand.

"I'm scared of myself, I'm scared that I might hurt you, I'm scared that you may leave and reject me like everyone else has always done, I'm scared that maybe the witches can defeat me"

"Michael... my poor demon boy, I'm not leaving you" I told him getting closer and giving his hand a little squeeze.

"Don't you think I'm a monster?,I mean I've killed enough people in front of you without hesitation."

"I don't, you did it to protect me, and well there are other times that I'm not so sure what the reason was. But I don't think you are a monster" I told him looking into his deep blue eyes.

He just lowered his gaze and seemed to be worried again.

"Michael, what were you dreaming about?" I told him, maybe talking about it could help him feel better.

"I-I was just dreaming of all the people I've let down"

"And what else?" I kissed his hand trying to give him confidence so he continued telling me.

"I saw them, all, I heard their last words before giving up on me. And I was alone again, with no one to guide me"

I decided that tonight I needed to be the one to support Michael and help him sleep, so I sat on the bed, against the headboard and told Michael to rest his head on my legs, but he decided to also sit, between my legs and resting his head on my chest. In this position it was easy for me to surround him with my arms and brush his hair with my fingers.

"They were all weak for giving up on you, it is not your fault" I told him.

"There's something wrong with me, I accept it now, but it doesn't mean that I wish I could be different. That I could be worthy of people caring for me"

"But you are, Meade and I love you so much. There's nothing wrong with you Michael" I told him resting my head over his.

"I'm not sure for how long are you going to be able to keep saying that" He told me with a lugubrious tone, as he had already been thinking about me leaving too many times before and have already accept it.