Taco Hell

Satanas De Tacos

Barb wasn't working that morning. She called in and told Spencer that it was getting too close to her wedding and had to take a few days off. Understandable Spencer allowed her to do this and now Connor was alone doing the boring morning shift.

The morning shift was when Taco Hell was the least busiest. This might have been one of the reasons Connor signed up for this shift, but he wouldn't tell you that.

Connor wasn't a weirdo, nor did he enjoy anything dark or satanic. So, the reason he somehow ended up where he did was confusing. Even to him.

Now, where was Connor you ask. Well reader, Connor was sitting on the floor of the Taco Hell building, trying to summon the Taco Devil. No one really knows about the Taco Devil except for Connor, and no one should. You see, the Taco Devil is a special entity from Hell who joins the mortal world once every red moon (every month). But, the only way he can do this is if a mortal summons him into the world. Now, the Taco Devil wasn't one of those evil entities that want to peel your skin off or burning your arm hair. No, he was a chill being. One you gives you free editable glitter when asked and has a tabasco dispenser inside his horn. If you're lucky he'll even show you the Grey Goose dispenser in his tail.

Connor was sitting on the ground, ancient cursed book in hand, and ready to perform the ritual. Hesitantly, Connor pried the book opened to the correct page and looked down at the instructions:

Create circle of taco seasoning on floor

Add pentagram

Place burritos and hot sauce packets (interchangeable) on the points of the pentagram

Place pile of three tacos stacked in the middle of the circle

Make taco sacrifice with fourth taco.

Drench the summoning spot with vodka (preferably Grey Goose)

Light it up suckers.

Connor did as the book said. Starting off by raiding the storage closet of the taco seasoning and taking the spices and alining them in a pentagram. He then made three burritos and snatched three hot sauce bottles from the tables in the dining area. Then placing them on the 'spikes' of the pentagram. Next, he arranged the three tacos as told and placed the fourth one on his hand. Slicing the unopened side of the shell apart, ripping it open and cracking the crust into two separate parts and crushing it's remains unto its brethren (please remember that I'm talking about a taco, don't be scared). He then took the Grey Goose he stole from the corner store and poured it all over the ritual spot. He then grabbed his lighter and as the book said, lit that sucker on fire. The fire blazed high, and for a second Connor was sure he was about to burn the building down. The flames started spreading and soon enveloped Connor. His view only consisting of yellow, orange, and red. Then only red. He looked down and saw summoning spot glowing blue. He was here. A hole then opened up and out came a beast of an entity. Glowing the same blue as the summoning spot the beast then yowled and pulled its legs through the gaping pit. Finally, standing right infront of Connor... was the Taco Devil.

The Taco Devil was huge, standing around nine feet the beast towered over Connor. His body had that classic devil shape, with hooves and the red fur to match.

"Hello." It calmly spoke. Inside its mouth were a row of teeth made from lettuce, shaped into spikes. A tomato slipping in between its teeth, a tongue. Then, sitting atop its head was a crown made entirely of tacos. Wisps of red, what looked to be floating fur, moved back and forth on its back and tail. But, upon closer inspection the fur turned out to be floating taco seasoning.

Connor stood frigid in shock. It worked. The ritual had worked. He then cleared his throat and with a raspy voice replied "Hey." The Taco Devil stepped closer and peered into Connor's eyes as he did the same. The Taco Devil's eyes were a kaleidoscope of colors and shaped, all moving together. The closer you looked into them the more they turned and changed colors. Connor's mind went blank. He couldn't even begin to comprehend what was right in front of him.

"WHy have you summoned me?"

"I...I-"

"I mean I was taking a nice short nap and now suddening I was summoned to a random Taco Bell! How did The Book of Demon Summoning and Mexican Food: Children's Edition even get here?" Connor stared baffled, "I just showed up one day behind the freezer." The Taco Devil nodded and made a grunting noise. "Do you happen to know why it showed up?" The Taco Devil turned back around, "Wait, didn't you read my automatic e-mail?"

"I skimmed it." The Taco Devil grunted again, but in frustration. He then picked up the book from below Connor's feet and turned to one of the pages. "Just, read this kid."

To whomever finds this book:

Congrats on getting your grimy little hands (or paws) onto this book of ours. Now, you might be wondering at this point why this book has landed in your possession. [You may skip this if you have completed your training in Devil's Work & Culinary Class]

Now if you, a mortal, have somehow found yourself with this book in hand you've done something to trigger such an event. You're probably asking yourself, what have I done? Well inhabitant of the crust of earth we've compiled a lists just for you!

You're a satanist who enjoys mexican food a bit too much for human standards [you know what you did you dirty boi]

You were performing a ritual and instead of a demon or some other evil entity showing up you got a taco, and ate it

You work at Taco Bell.

Enjoy you slimy specimen!

Connor closed the book and looked back up at the Taco Devil, who was currently shoulder deep in a container of raw beef. "Okay, listen here buckaroo. I don't know what you're powers are or if you're evil. But, I'd like to know a few things about you. So, spill sis." Connor wasn't sure where that last part came from but right now it didn't matter. "Well, since you asked so nicely..." The Taco Devil wiped his mouth and did another grunt. "Okay, so I am the Taco Devil. I was born in a certain section of Hell only few have the 'pleasure' to witness. I'm a scorpio and my favorite food that is super yummy is raw beef!" The Taco Devil finished as Connor decided to sit unto on of the folding chair they had in the kitchen.

"So are you gonna follow me home or something?" He questioned.

"Nah, since my summoning point is here I am bound to only this building."

"Is that really how it works?"

"Yea." Connor stood up once again and started to clean up the mess he and the Taco Devil had made. Meanwhile, the Taco Devil started to look around. This place was new, a clear upgrade to his past living area within the belly of a whale travelling through middle earth and into The Microwave of Doom. Although small, the Taco Devil enjoyed it's quaint feeling of hormonal teenagers and mountain dew.

Once Connor was done he traveled into the dining area and saw the taco Devil checking out one of the security cameras.

"Hell you doin'? Can't people see you? If someone realizes I was the cause of you being here I'm screwed!"

"Don't worry. Camera's can't pick me up. The only way to see me is to snort paprika."

"Wait, but I didn't snort paprika."

"You get a free pass since you were the one to summon me."

"Ah, okay. Chill." The Taco Devil left the area and sat down on one of the counter's in the kitchen. "One last question. How long will you be here?"

"As long as you want me too buddy."