Amnesia

Chapter 8

A/N : Trigger warning: Sam has a panic attack later in this chapter. If that would be triggering for you at any point, I will point a trigger warning before and after that section so you can just skip over it.

I'm going to try to develop Sam and Colby's relationship in the next three chapters, but it's really more of a slow burn so sorry about that.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy this next part!

Chapter 8

The next day Sam was released from the hospital with a stern admonition from Dr. Redford and a card for a therapist that Sam had no intention to go to tucked into his wallet.

Unsurprisingly, Colby was the one who came to pick him up from the hospital.

"The doctor's sure you're good, dude?" Colby asked as he helped Sam put what little he'd had with him in the trunk of the car.

"Yeah, dude, the doctor cleared me. Told me to get some rest, and make a follow up to see how I'm doing." Sam said as he climbed into the passenger seat. Truthfully, he was grateful to be out of the hospital, and away from the nurses and doctors who came in at all hours of the day and night to check on him and ask him probing questions.

Thankfully, Colby wasn't like that, and he didn't ask him any more questions as he started the engine and pulled out onto the highway.

Throughout the drive back to the trap house, he kept up an endless stream of chatter. Underneath the everyday talk, Sam could hear the deeper meaning underscoring Colby's words. Various iterations of you sure you're okay? and do you need anything?

Sam wished he wouldn't treat him like he was made of glass. He made a dumb mistake and hopefully learned from it. He wished that they could all move on, but he knew that it wasn't that simple.

Sam could see that Colby was still shaken up from the whole thing and it would take him more than just a couple days to get over it.

So, he played along. He smiled too much, even though smiling seemed like something strange and different to him these days. He laughed at all of Colby's dumb jokes.

When they got to the house, Sam had to reassure Colby that he was genuinely and truly tired about thirty times before he let him go up to his room.

It was the first time in three days that Sam was completely by himself. Now that he'd gotten what he wanted though, Sam wasn't sure that being by himself was all that it was cracked up to be. His room seemed too big and too silent with just him inside of it.

His phone was silent where it lay on his bedside table, which was strange. In the last few days, none of the roommates, or his friends, or his family could stop texting him to see if he was okay. He was sure that his mom had called about ten times in the last 72 hours, and honestly, it was strange that his phone should be so still and silent now.

It's what I want he told himself, but he knew that that was just a lie.

The truth was, being alone was a strange thing for Sam. He preferred to be surrounded by people, whether it was the roommates or his family, for the most part, Sam was not solitary by nature.

Once he'd gotten with Kat, well, that had made being alone even harder to bear. He'd come to rely on the warmth and comfort of her being there. He no longer had to rely on just himself when it involved the sticky, intimate things that came with a relationship.

Of course, he had Colby and Colby was his best friend, but they didn't share secret kisses in the night or make furtive plans about their future lying awake together in the dark. There were things he just couldn't tell his best friend.