Amnesia

Chapter 19

A/N: Warning, there will be adult content *ahem* smut in this chapter. So if you don't like it don't read it. You can't say I didn't warn you. As always I will put up a disclaimer before and after, so feel free to skip it. 

Chapter 19

The surprise party had heralded a new beginning in a way. Sam was determined to not let himself sink back into the sad depressive state he had existed in for far too long and he'd kept true to his promise to Colby to come to him when he was feeling like the world was becoming too much.

A month into their relationship, and well, things weren't easy, but they were good. (A/N: I skipped like a month because I'm lazy lol)

One thing that Sam had not anticipated when he agreed to a relationship with Colby was how much Colby challenged him. Not only in personal ways, but also about their relationship and talking about their relationship and their feelings.

He never accepted an "I'm fine" because he knew Sam too well and that an "I'm fine" usually meant "I'm stressed out and really not doing okay."

But Sam had also learned that it was good to be challenged because it was far more healthy to talk about what he was feeling than bottling it up and having it explode in his face. Which was what usually happened. It had also taught Sam to be a good listener because as much as Colby expected open communication; he valued it even more as a personal character trait.

Another surprising thing about their relationship was how open Colby was with him. Not that he wasn't emotionally open before, but this was a whole new level of emotion that Sam had never seen out of him. Colby wasn't an outwardly emotional guy, but that didn't mean, as Sam also already knew, that he didn't feel, just that he didn't really talk about his feelings all that much. The only exception, it seemed, was in their relationship.

And Sam had learned so much about Colby. How actions meant so much more to him than a simple phrase. How touch could communicate a thousand things that Sam could never put into words.

They were progressing. Slowly, but sometimes, as Aesop once wrote, the turtle did beat the hare. Sam liked who he was when he was with him. Colby made him a better version of himself- far more than Kat ever had.

Reflecting, Sam realized that there were a lot of things about his relationship with Kat that were toxic, but the only reason he knew that was because those things didn't exist between him and Colby. That wasn't to say that he and Colby didn't have arguments, because they did and often.

In many ways, he and Colby were opposites of one another. Sam was far more expressive than Colby but Colby was more apt to run headfirst into danger. The phrase "look before you leap" never applied to him. Their contrasting natures were what made their relationship, both platonically, and now, romantically, work so well. Even though it was a cliché, the thought that opposites attract really did apply in their case.

But that also meant at times large differences in opinion or perception that predictably led to arguments and slamming doors. 

Despite this, Sam was also learning that as strange as it seemed, fighting with Colby was actually, in a way, healthy, because it got all the bad feelings out in the open. It allowed each of them to say their piece and then walk away. And inevitably come back and try to figure out where the fight had started.

Yeah, communication was a big part of their relationship- a strange thing for Sam who was used to walking on eggshells with all of his previous partners, Kat included.

Colby wasn't really into playing games, which Sam found he appreciated, but not something he'd ever considered before. Again, another toxic part of his and Kat's relationship that he'd come to find out about. The ways she would shut him out and he would have to "earn back" her favour. Apologizing for things he didn't even know that he'd done wrong in the first place. With Kat, he'd never really known where he stood, but that was never the case with Colby.