Casual Affair//Brallon&Ryden (Bryllon)

22

The whole fact that this was unfolding so suddenly and quickly on Brendon was overwhelming. He wished he had more time to process this whole thing. Either more time to process it, or more time to fix the whole thing without having his lovers know a thing. He sat there on his bed, waiting for the other man to walk through his door into the eerily dark and sorrowful room. Now was the time for Brendon to face his demons.

The old oak door creaked open loudly and revealed a very upset looking Dallon in the door frame. Brendon avoided eye contact with him and Ryan. The betrayed men stood at the edge of the weeping boys bed, staring at him in his most vulnerable state. The 18 year old felt a weight push down onto the foot of the bed. He slowly peered up and saw Dallon sitting down with his head in his hands. No one said a word. The only sound that could be heard in the dark room was the quiet shuddering breath from the sobbing boy.

Dallon let out a deep sigh and shook his head. “I’m… not going to ask you to explain yourself. You don’t have to.” he blurted out. Brendon stayed staring at his lap, hot tears running down his face. Silently crying with the occasional hiccup. “I also don’t want you to apologize. I don’t need you to.” Dallons words were shocking both Ryan and Brendon. Why didn’t he want him to apologize? Ryan felt like he deserved all the apologies in the world, but he didn’t say anything about it.

But Dallon’s words we’re strange to Brendon. Last time he recalled, Dallon was so extremely possessive over him. His proprietorial words echoing in his mind, “I don’t like other people touching my things.”

Those words make Brendon ache. But it seemed as if Dallon wasn’t too torn up at all. He instead just looked… empty.

“All I want is you to listen to what I have to say.” Dallon looked directly at Brendon. His emotional state changed from emptiness to sorrow and pain, his eyes were brimming with these emotions. Brendon waited, his heart beating  faster as he became more and more nervous to find out what the tall man would say.  

“This is what we both came up with.” Ryan interjected. Brendon darted his eyes back and forth from the 2 men, anticipating their next sentences.

Dallon started, “You can either pick between us…”

“...or have neither of us.” Ryan finished.

That was the one thing Brendon didn’t want to decide at all. And now that he had  to, he felt like he was going to faint. The boy stayed silent, unable to form any words.  “We know it’s a difficult decision. But you have to pick, Brendon. We both understand why you did it. But now, you have to make a choice. It’s for your own good."

“And our own good.” Ryan mumbled.

He went numb. “You want me… to choose…” he weeped. It was hard enough that he already knew that he had to choose, but when he heard it from Dallon and Ryan, it really sunk in. “Yes. Either choose, or leave us both. You can’t both, Brendon. That’s not fair to any of us.” Ryan crossed his arms and looked at Brendon with an unreadable expression. Dallon nodded in agreement.

“But… I love you both…” he sadly whispered. Ryan sighed. Dallon put his hand on Brendons leg to comfort him.”Neither of us will hate you. Neither of us will be upset with your choice Brendon. I at least wont… Ryan?”

Ryan hesitated on answering. He loved Brendon. He’s loved him ever since they first began talking. But he resented him for doing this. He didn't want to be selfish, but he couldn’t imagine being without him again. If Brendon chose Dallon, he wouldn’t guarantee that won't be hurt.

Even if Brendon decided to be with neither of them, he would still be upset. The one thing that’s keeping Ryan sane is knowing that no matter which decision Brendon makes, he won’t lose him. Even if he loses him in one way, he won’t lose his best friend.