Reflections [Complete]

Chapter 23

Kong's POV

I had woken up quite some time ago but I remained curled up on my side, my back pressed against Arthit. His soft breathing the only sound in the entire room. I was still clad only in my boxers and the blanket had fallen away from me sometime during the nap. I was both intensely aware of my near nakedness and still oddly comfortable lying next to him. Although that wasn't the only emotion I was feeling right now.

I can't believe I responded to him the way I had. I was almost hungrily kissing him back when he all but stripped me naked and had touched me. Made me climax. And just the thought of his hands and lips on me, and my wanton reactions was turning me on again. I was partially embarrassed that I had let him into my bed so easily and partially disappointed that he stopped when he did. But if even I can't manage to figure out what is going on in my head right now, I doubt he would have been able to correctly guess. So despite wavering between shame and arousal I was still really glad that he stuck around me even when I couldn't give him what he wanted. That he was still here when I woke up. And that warm feeling lasted until he spoke his next words.

"Kong..."

"Hmmm?"

"We need to talk."

I could feel my body immediately stiffen. Why do people say those words. Nothing good ever comes at the end of that sentence.

"Wh...what?"

But instead of replying he slipped off the bed and switched on the light, instantly throwing the harsh reality of our situation in our faces, and I immediately became very aware of my near nakedness as I scrambled off to gather my clothes strewn around the bed. He watched me steadily as I struggled to get my fingers under control and pull on my clothes. And I similarly avoided his intense stare, stealing only a quick glance before I stepped away from the bed to the relative safety of the dining table. And the quick glance was enough for me to know that nothing that follows from now on is going to be a pleasant experience. I know that look in his eyes. I know that expression. That is his face when he is gearing for a hard fight. For when he knows the opposite party that he is dealing with is going to be hostile and that he needs to win with any means necessary. And since the only person in this room that he could possibly be in battle with is me, I know he is going to crush me soon.

He came and sat by me at the table. Hesitating a few moments before reaching out to grab my hand, midway changing his mind and abandoning the attempt. My heart was starting to race at his very confusing behavior all day and he had yet to say even a word.

"Kong, I need to know the name of the man. I need to know what he did to you."

I could almost feel my lungs deflating. Like someone had punched the air right out of it. I couldn't go from finally letting someone touch me again to revisiting my past. I couldn't sit here just hours after having Arthit caress my body so lovingly to him coldly asking me to describe my rape. I wasn't ready to talk about it. To anyone. Especially not to Arthit. Never to Arthit. He was my escape from all the darkness. He was my light. I wanted these two worlds to never ever have to touch. I simply couldn't do it.

So I schooled my expression to as neutral as I could make them from years of practice and remained stubbornly silent. If I just didn't speak about it Arthit would stop asking. He would never push me to do something I didn't want. Especially not about this.

"Listen, Kong. This is very important. You need to tell me what happened."

I automatically lowered my gaze from him. His piercing eyes prying for too much information. For all these months he had never brought any of this up. Never asked me anything. Ended any conversation that was even remotely difficult for me. So why was he suddenly asking me about this. Why does he need to know any of this now.