Reflections [Complete]

Arthit's Musings 2.

Something just keeps going wrong. No matter how much I want things to get atleast slightly less rocky nothing I do seems to help. In fact it is literally the opposite. The more I try to shield Kong from the frenzy of the hounds around us, the more I seem to push him into a bottomless pit of doom. The more I tried to take the limelight away from him, the more the attention of the country was zoomed in on him. The lawyers, the media, co-workers, even our extended family members all of them treating us as entertainment, waiting to watch the climax of our lives crumbling as a very public spectacle.

And all of this has led to this frustrating dissonance in our relation. Fights, arguments, raised voices, sleepless nights, they have become almost a daily occurrence. And with every passing moment I could feel myself slowly losing Kong. He was slipping away from me, retreating into his shell and I just didn't know how to stop it anymore.

In fact our last argument had been so bitter that he marched out of my apartment in the middle of dinner. Dinner, that was going to be the last one for two weeks since I was supposed to be out of the country on a business trip. And since neither of us are great at resolving fights over the phone, it just hung there. Suspended in time until our anger cooled down enough to forgive each other. And although, in the fortnight I was away I wasn't ready to apologize for what was clearly not my fault, I still missed him. So straight from the airport I drove to his apartment while he was no where to be found.

He wouldn't answer my insistent knock on his door, my messages, calls, nothing. And it was barely 6 in the morning. Where could he possibly be so early in the morning. And after two hours of pacing up and down his corridor I was close to freaking out. Thankfully, before I went lodging police reports of missing persons I saw him walk up the stairs towards his apartment.

"What the fuck Kong? Where have you been?"

"Arthit? Hi! When did you come back?"

"Where were you so early in the morning? And why is your phone off? Do you have any idea how freaked out I have been? I have been waiting here for two hours absolutely not knowing what happened to you or where you were."

"You have been standing here for two hours?"

"Answer my question dammit. Where the fuck did you spend the night? Don't you care that I have to keep worrying about you? Why was your phone off?"

As soon as I had raised my voice I knew what his reaction would be. His shock, even partial pleasure at seeing me was instantly replaced with his patented neutral expression and his ever present mask was placed firmly over his face.

"I dont need to tell you where I was."

And just like that our cold war had somehow resumed. Although, I followed him into his apartment, even silently ate breakfast with him, but we barely exchanged a few words. I had wanted to tell him about my appointment with his therapist today but I doubt this was a good time to bring it up. He had vehemently refused to let me accompany him to any sessions. He had multiple joint sessions with Ria, some even with my dad, but not one with me. So I went behind his back and scheduled an appointment with his therapist for myself. I needed to know what was going on with him. I needed to know how to help us, cause the way we were going now, there soon wouldn't be an us to help.

When I stood up to leave without us having really exchanged any substantial words he hesitated a little, like he wanted to say something, but eventually giving up and busying himself, ignoring my presence.

Hence, I was more than ready for my personal session with his therapist to pry as much information about him as possible. And with barely concealed nervous energy I sat on a couch across from a stern looking middle aged lady peeking at me through her thick rimmed glasses.