Blessed (a larry stylinson fanfiction)

chapter 14

Saturday, October 20th

Harry’s POV

“Get your lazy ass out of this bed right now!”

I opened my eyes slightly and suddenly realized it was hard to breathe because someone was sitting on my chest, crushing my lungs.

“Cher, please…get…of…me.” I struggled to get out.

“Only once you tell me what the hell is going on with you!” Cher snapped, glaring down at me.

“Cher, I can’t breathe.” I choked out.

Cher huffed and climbed off of me, allowing me to get in a full breath of air.

I rubbed my eyes and tried to gather what was going on.

I had been avoiding Cher ever since I found out that Louis and Eleanor slept together and I went and hooked up with that bartender.

“Harry, you didn’t go to that place again, did you?” Cher asked, her voice full of concern.

Dammit, I would have rather had her voice full of anger than worry. That way she could be mad instead of disappointed.

I ignored her and rolled out of bed, finding a shirt and pulling it on.

“Harry. Answer me. What did you do?” Cher said her voice a little shaky.

“Cher, just let me wake up a bit before you start the interrogation, okay?” I bit back, turning to scowl at her before walking into the bathroom to brush my teeth and gather my thoughts.

What was I going to tell her?

I rested my hands on the edges of the sink and looked up at myself in the mirror.

Fuck, I couldn’t hide the guilt in my eyes.

I splashed some water on my face and tried to think of a way to make what happened not sound as bad as it probably was.

The funny part was, I didn’t regret what I did—I had an urge and I got it satisfied, end of story. If I told that to Cher, though, she would find a million things wrong with that and scold me for not finding a more healthy way of dealing with my problems.

I walked back into my room to find Cher perched on the edge of my bed, biting her nails like she always did when she was worried.

She looked up at me when she heard me close the door behind me.

“Are you ready to talk now?” Cher asked.

I nodded.

I took a deep breath before starting to explain. “Louis called me the night he and Eleanor, uh, well you know. He was really upset and I talked to him about it trying to make him feel better and understand that he didn’t make some huge mistake, even though if I’m being honest, I think he did. I hated seeing him all torn up about something and he kept saying how important Eleanor is to him and how he loves her more than anything…I just…I snapped. When I came home, I went to the bar and, well, I don’t think I really need to tell you what exactly happened there.”

“Harry…” Cher said, her eyes worried as she rested a hand on my shoulder. “I thought you were over that.”

“Apparently not!” I shouted, suddenly angry and defensive.

Cher looked at me clearly taken aback by my outburst, but for some reason that only seemed to make me angrier.

"You don't get it Cher! I don't have the strength and confidence that you do! It's a million times harder for me to wake up every morning and face the new day knowing that I may never be happy! I wake up and realize that the man I desperately love is in love with someone else and will never see me the way I want him to! I just...I don't see how that's at all fair."